New York Magazine's Sex Lives

This week, we talk to Alexa Tsoulis-Reay, who's spent the last year interviewing men who've castrated themselves to "cure" their "sex addiction," women in relationships with their fathers, men in love with horses, and many other human outliers for her "What It's Like" series. We also check back in with William Lloyd, the man who took an Internet stand against cunnilingus. With Allison P. David, Maureen O'Connor, and David Wallace-Wells. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

And we go super deep on it, talking at length with Debra Pascali-Bonaro, who made a whole documentary about it (you may never forget these clips). We also speak about orgasms that make you deaf, with Sophie Saint Thomas, who speaks from experience, and debate what euphemisms for vagina a man can actually safely use. With Allison P. Davis, Maureen O'Connor, and David Wallace-Wells. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

It's the closest you can get to an orgy with just two people-- but has 69ing gone out of style? Also up for discussion: the joys of lazy sex, the terrors of vagina-spanking, controversial views on lubricants, and the most psychotic ex-boyfriends of all time, as ranked by Jennifer Wright, author of It Ended Badly: 13 of the Worst Breakups in History. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

We’re joined by “Sylvia,” the anonymous creator of the blog “How to Make Me Come,” which is now a podcast as well. She tells us about the impetus to create an online compendium of real women sharing exact instructions for how to get them off, as well as her hopes that the project will help people get over their eternal fear of being honest about sex. Plus: what’s the deal with men who refuse to go down on women? With David Wallace-Wells, Maureen O’Connor, and Allison Davis. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

You know that thing when you go to a party and nobody talks to you? The same can happen at orgies. Special guest Anna Pulley explains the agony of awkward orgy-going and how to troubleshoot it. Meanwhile, a new 3-D sex movie features a history-making cumshot. And why does Justin Bieber call his penis "she"? With Allison P. Davis, Maureen O'Connor, and David Wallace-Wells. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Now that Neil Strauss and Tucker Max have found feminism (and grappled with sex addiction) is the age of pickup artistry dead? Or are gender, sex, and love dead -- as a new generation of agender, asexual, and aromantic college activists argue? And what's up with this Zola thing on Twitter? With Allison P. Davis, Maureen O'Connor, David Wallace-Wells, and guest Tim Murphy. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Will anything ever unseat the eggplant emoji as the ideal cartoon dong? And with all the R&D money at emoji HQ, can’t they do better than a taco for vagina? We also talk about Nantucket’s amazing history of whaling-industry-era dildos and just how much of a capital offense it is when an ex keeps using your Netflix password. With Allison P. Davis, Maureen O’Connor, and David Wallace-Wells Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

This week, we talk about the odd phenomenon of men trying to re-stretch their circumcised foreskins, whether post-sex blues says more about the fucking or more about you (it’s you!) and about how millenials (including Allison!) aggressively edit their social-media networks after a breakup. With Allison P. Davis, Maureen O’Connor, and David Wallace-Wells. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

This week, Maureen offers what she swears is the absolute last and final word on dating apps (her mantra: the tech doesn’t matter, just the people). We also discuss a new study about the way in which sexual types may be the result of early relationships actually imprint themselves on us as permanent preferences (offering an explanation for why everybody you’ve ever dated looks exactly the same, if that happens to be the case). And we applaud a recent spate of super-hot interracial lesbian sex on television. With Allison P. Davis, Maureen O’Connor, and David Wallace-Wells  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Is dating a lopsided numbers game in which women are screwed? We talk to Jon Birger, author of Dateonomics (who says, yes, totally). We also debate when in a relationship the sex is best (wondering why it takes people so long to figure out how to fuck each other properly) and whether it's possible to extract yourselves from a friends-with-benefits situation without kissing friendship goodbye. With Allison P. Davis, Maureen O'Connor, and David Wallace-Wells Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this episode, we go long with Sex Myth author Rachel Hills, who argues that sex-soaked culture has given us sexual standards that literally no one’s sex life matches up with. With Maureen O’Connor and David Wallace-Wells.   Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Is monogamy over? A new Time magazine story says it should be, and we wonder just how much influence Dan Savage has had on our sex lives. We also discuss the (reliable) glories of the pull-out method, and how relationships change birth-control strategies. And: What an ENFP discovered about Myers-Briggs dating (avoid INTJs!). Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

When is the best season for boning? We debate the essay “Towards a Theory of Fall Fuckability" by Jamie Lauren Keiles. Also: a new study says the ideal dick for women is only barely bigger than average (Maureen and Allison disagree). And: we talk about Allison’s fantastic cultural history of the bionic cock. With Maureen O’Connor, Allison P. Davis, and David Wallace-Wells. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

This week, we go long on sexual stamina—how long is too long, how long is just right, and when did we start taking an egg-timer to bed? The answer: very recently! You know, about the time men started actually caring about women’s pleasure. We also talk about whether masturbation can ruin your dick (or vagina!) and a blog soliciting sex-instruction manuals from women. With Maureen O’Connor, Allison P. Davis, and David Wallace-Wells Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

How did Ashley Madison build a billion-dollar casual-sex site without actually arranging any actual casual sex? We discuss the company’s insane fembot army and the pathetic gullibility of 22 million male users. Also: a new study says people in relationships bone in the butt more often. With Maureen O’Connor, Allison P. Davis and David Wallace-Wells. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

A new “study” of sext-selfies makes the case that prettiness comes in all shapes and sizes (so long as the selfie, and the vagina, are well-lit). But how much can we trust this study, and how gross do we feel talking about ranking women’s bodies like this? We’ll also discuss Kevin Bacon’s crusade to get more penises into motion pictures, and some new data showing that relationships between sexters are actually stronger than more prudish texters.  With Allison P. Davis, Maureen O’Connor, and David Wallace-Wells Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Maybe they’re not actually straight? We discuss a new book on the historyof clandestine same-sex coupling and a new dating-app-alarmism classic,“Tinder and the Dating Apocalypse.” With Maureen O’Connor, Rich Juzwiak,Jesse Singal, and David Wallace-Wells. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

 It includes one with multiple holes in a single wall! Merely one of many amazing things we learn from talking to the man behind the new Museum of Sex history of hard-core and we go long on just how much sex goes on behind the scenes of the Bachelorette (and how this season finally broke the show's prudish code of sex etiquette). Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

A team of scientists have determined universal penis beauty standards-- but do we agree with their findings? A heated debate about grooming, size, and male locker room culture follows. We also discuss a new study about race and online dating, and anthropological findings that suggest fewer than half of the world's cultures engage in romantic kissing. With Allison P. Davis, Maureen O'Connor, and guest host Rich Juzwiak. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

This week: First you fall in love, then you get naked-- but what if it was the other way around? Maureen learns how nudists flirt, and Allison interviews the stars of her favorite TV show, Dating Naked. Plus, a visit to the Hooters of dicks. With Allison P. Davis, Maureen O'Connor, and David Wallace-Wells. More at thecut.com and nymag.com.This episode is sponsored by Showtime's "Masters of Sex." The critically acclaimed series "Masters of Sex" returns Sunday. New episodes air on Sundays at 10/9 Central Time, only on Showtime.Panoply’s conducting a survey. Click here to fill it out: Panoply.fm/surveyBy filling it out you'll help Panoply make great podcasts about the thing you love, and things you didn't even know you loved.Panoply.fm/survey Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices