The Overwhelmed Brain | Stress | Anxiety | Relationship | Critical Thinking | Emotional Intelligence | Emotional Abuse

Self-worth and happiness is a right. It should be something you proudly claim without fear. Yet, so many people have trouble believing they are worthy, or worse, worthy of happiness. It's time to clear the path of obstacles blocking your worth and happiness so that you can feel good in your own skin again.

When you sign up for a relationship, you sign up for who they are now but are you signing up for who you hope they'll be as well? Are the expectations that should be met when it comes to a relationship? And if they aren't met, do you have every right to demand they be met, "or else?" Sometimes we need to revisit the contract we signed getting into a relationship and what it means for us if who we thought they were isn't really who they are.

The past can wreak havoc on the present, especially on your relationships. If therapy, reading, watching videos, and learning all you can about how to improve and heal isn't working, sometimes you need to dig so deep that break down the wall that's hiding the true source of pain underneath. At that point, healing can begin.

Is true love supposed to last throughout your life? Should you feel love for those that have wronged you in some way in previous relationships? Is it healthy? Having that loving feeling for previous partners in your life can raise questions in current relationships. It's a good idea to get clear on what your best course of action is.

The relentless pursuit of power over you is where some people are in your life. They come at you, offend you, insult you, and expect you to do what they want. It's easy to dismiss when they're strangers. But what about if they're family? Is there a way to interact with them and keep your power?

Perfectionists, workaholics, and procrastinators unite! At least for this episode. Perfectionism is almost a disease that sabotages your path and takes away your precious time for more important things in life.

How many times have you thought you might be the problem when the reality might be much different than that? Are you the honest type that will take responsibility when you discover you're at fault for something? Are they? Lots of questions that deserve answers. It's time to figure out if it's you or them.

If you've reached a level of personal growth of development that you are happy about and are ready to take it to the next level, but those around you are still in a place that forces you to slow down and meet them where they are instead, is it selfish to continue your journey or should you go at their pace? In this episode, a wife asks if it's selfish to follow her path when her husband is reaching out to her while on his own path.

Sometimes we can't help ourselves. Anger can come out of the blue and suddenly, we're hurting someone we care about.  I received an email from someone who believes that sometimes you need people in your life to understand that you are going to get upset now and again, and they should be empathetic for your inability to control it. They have ADHD and have a challenge controlling the emotions that come up.  What is the solution? Should those you love be more tolerant of hurtful behavior or should they put you in your place, telling you to stop or else?   

If you have ever dealt with body image issues, this is an important episode that addresses the subject of someone who lost over 100 pounds and learned that people treated her much differently afterward, She was living the life she always wanted. Until she realized it wasn't only the pounds she lost. She lost something a lot deeper. And happiness didn't last. This is a special episode of The Overwhelmed Brain where I introduce you to an amazing podcast called A Slight Change of Plans. I'm going to play you a segment from an episode that I believe has a powerful life lesson for all of us. A Slight Change of Plans is hosted by Dr. Maya Shankar, who is a cognitive scientist that studies how our minds work and how we change. She hosts intimate conversations that give an unvarnished look into how people navigate changes of all kinds and use that change to ultimately grow. You’ll hear little-known personal stories and reflections from familiar names, like Tiffany Haddish, Kacey Musgraves, and even former first lady

Fears you learned to cope with in childhood can easily turn into dysfunctions as an adult. How you cope today makes a huge difference in what happens in your life and who you keep around in your life. Sometimes you can resolve a lot of problems by getting rid of useless dysfunctions. But sometimes you can utilize dysfunctions to your advantage. This is a packed episode.

The more you try to please a controlling person, the worse your life will get. Highly controlling people cannot be satisfied because people around them will never be able to do enough to meet their criteria. Even when you meet it, there'll be more you need to give. If you're dealing with a controlling person, this might be the episode for you.

Romantic relationships can create some of the most complex emotional challenges in your life. From heartful to heartache, from elated to deflated, relationships bring us through a roller coaster of emotions until we are either fulfilled or completely drained. It doesn't have to be that way. Sometimes the right tools and the right mindset can create relationships that don't have to be so difficult. In fact, they can be wonderful when you know how to deal with the challenges that show up.

It's a challenge to stay present for someone who is so down and out. Sometimes you go into your own "stuff" trying to help them with theirs. It's the curse of many highly sensitive people, and certainly difficult for almost any empathetic person. But there are ways to do this, and sometimes it's necessary if the person you are there for just can't get out of their upset.

We can create our own dysfunction but be so jaded by those around us that we can't think clearly enough to stop toxic or hurtful behavior. There's a time when you have to get away from other people so that the fog can lift and you can think clearly. It is during those times when a lot of healing can take place.

Many unresolved emotions sit outside the box of current thinking. Albert Einstein said, “We cannot solve our problems with the same thinking we used when we created them.” When you aren't getting the results you want today, or you find yourself easily triggered by certain events or people, you may be carrying around old baggage that perhaps requires a level of thinking just outside the box. If you don't want to go outside that box, it could be why you're stuck.

When someone you care about leaves or dies, there is a space inside you where they used to be. Your identity was wrapped up with them. They were a part of you. And because of that, when they're gone, you can feel lost. You can feel lonely within even when you're around others. It's important to start filling that space with something that gives you meaning and purpose.

Where should you start when it comes to healing old stuff from the past? Should you do a deep dive into your childhood, bringing up all kinds of memories and traumas that you may or may not have repeated to therapists over and over again? Or should you talk about how it bothers you today and see if someone can help you gain a new perspective? What about skipping over the trauma and just looking at what behavior came out of it? There's a path you can take to reverse old emotional triggers just by doing something different to get a different result. If it sounds too easy, then you definitely need to listen to this episode.

There's a cause and effect to patterns of behavior that, if you don't recognize the relationship of those behaviors to the results you're getting, you may be creating results that you don't want. However, when you find out just what you're doing that might be causing you to sabotage your own happiness, you might be able to turn things around.

When the feelings of inadequacy overcome you, do you let them linger in the background? Do you repress them so that they come out in emotionally destructive ways later? Inadequacy usually has a source. We'll talk about that and a lot more in this packed episode.