Martini Shot

Rob runs into an old PA at lunch. Twenty years ago, he was clueless, sweaty and doughy. Now he’s sleek and successful, and Rob’s a little sweaty and doughy and clueless.

Looking for signs. When the phone rings and you're doing something cool, it's good news. When it rings and you're taking out the trash, don't answer it.

For 2014, get stuff done on time, be prompt, in other words, to be a completely different kind of person.

A really cool way to steal a lot of money from ATM's. Only trouble is, according to law enforcement, it could never work in real life...

Ruining the ending to an old movie, and old play and World War II.  Spoiler alert!

Dreams about winning the lottery.  Or, daydreaming about winning the lottery, which happens a lot more often.

What every single producer, writer, or director in the entertainment business has done since the beginning -- irritate one’s editor with stupid questions.

A lesson about karmic justice. It doesn't exist in the entertainment industry...

Rob sorts through his clothes, like some kind of archaeologist sifting through ancient ruins. What he discover is…

A conversation with a movie producer about how fat is too fat in a presidential candidate. In other words, does a possible President Chris Christie make me look thinner?

Sitting in the parking lot of an editing facility, Rob tries to gin up the courage to watch a rough cut. He eventually finds it, but only because it's a contractual obligation.

When stand-up comedians are completely out of material, resort to two basic topics: the differences between men and women, and the differences between New York and LA.

Rob buys a new pen and some socks and carry around a little piece of paper. Good luck charms for a new production.

Rob tries to cast a role for a very large person, but makes a big mistake: he uses the term “hugely overweight” in the character description. He’ll never do that again.

Rob Long remembers AC Lyles, the Mayor of the Paramount lot, and the best-dressed man in show business.

On today’s Martini Shot I figure out how never to come up with a new idea for a comedy. Just do the funny version of a successful drama.

Rob speaks truth to power: if a writer surfs the web all day, the writer doesn't get paid. If an executive surfs the web all day, the executive gets promoted…

The trick to making a sale: you make your pitch, and then you shut up. It's the shutting up part that messes most people up.

Rob faces what can only be described as an ethical dilemma. Which is unusual for him because he doesn't usually have ethics.

Rob talks about the second worst thing in the world: pitching a show the network doesn’t really want. The worst thing, of course, is pitching something they do.