Brick House

Ben Fraser gets interviewed by Jeremy Jones for the Tea and Crumpets Podcast and answers questions about the Brick House Web Series. Topics include how the series developed, new cast for Season 2, and why he chose “quitting porn” as the theme. - By the way, in case you are wondering, there is no such thing as the Tea and Crumpets podcast. ;) Check out the musical comedy Brick House Web Series at http://www.brickhousewebseries.com If you are listening to this, please let me know! http://brickhousewebseries.com/contact Also, follow on twitter @brickhousetv Or help people find it by giving a review or a rating on iTunes! http://bit.ly/1zhJnUj

Ben reminds every one struggling with addictive behaviors that feeling bad about yourself doesn’t help. If you have a set back, how can you turn things around so you feel better? Appreciation: http://pornfreeradio.com/027-how-idiots-track-success/ A podcast by Matt Dobschuetz about 5 additional ways to measure success besides counting sober days. Another episode that relates to the topic - knowing that you are lovable. http://pornfreeradio.com/002-unlovable/ Ben refers to the 1981 movie “American Werewolf in London,” but does not recommend it because it has some potentially triggering scenes. Sorry guys! We can’t watch “R” rated movies from the ‘80s. Check out the musical comedy Brick House Web Series at http://www.brickhousewebseries.com If you are listening to this, please let me know! http://brickhousewebseries.com/contact Also, follow on twitter @brickhousetv Or help people find it by giving a review or a rating on iTunes! http://bit.ly/1zhJnUj

Ben does a check-in about the challenges of staying sober this week, including unexpected triggers like helping a friend with computer stuff. Appreciation: Iyengar Yoga:http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Iyengar_Yoga Want to do the “legs up the wall pose/” It’s actually called“Viparita Karani” and it’s very easy to do. http://www.yogajournal.com/pose/legs-up-the-wall-pose/ Check out the musical comedy Brick House Web Series at http://www.brickhousewebseries.com If you are listening to this, please let me know! http://brickhousewebseries.com/contact Also, follow on twitter @brickhousetv Or help people find it by giving a review or a rating on iTunes! http://bit.ly/1zhJnUj

Sometimes you can get caught up in the addiction and ignore the obvious things you can do to quit. Ben talks about H.A.L.T.S., which stands for Hungry, Anxious, Lonely, Tired, and Stressed. (Some people think the “A” stands for Angry, which works too!) More about HALT: http://www.balboahorizons.com/halt-staying-sober-how-to-avoid-a-relapse-in-recovery/ If you can prevent yourself from feeling these triggers, it’s a lot easier to avoid the addictive behavior. For instance, if sleep is the trigger, then get more sleep! Here’s a site with some tips for getting more sleep. http://sleepfoundation.org/sleep-tools-tips/healthy-sleep-tips Appreciation: 2002 movie “About Schmidt” starring Jack Nicholson. http://www.rottentomatoes.com/m/about_schmidt/ Check out the musical comedy Brick House Web Series at http://www.brickhousewebseries.com If you are listening to this, please let me know! http://brickhousewebseries.com/contact Also, follow on twitter @brickhousetv Or help people find it by giving a review or a r

The podcast is on vacation this week, so Ben is sharing a song. Originally written and recorded in 2008, Ben was wrestling with urges on a daily basis. The process of writing and recording the song helped him get through a difficult time. He hopes it will inspire you as well. Check out the musical comedy Brick House Web Series at http://www.brickhousewebseries.com If you are listening to this, please let me know! http://brickhousewebseries.com/contact Also, follow on twitter @brickhousetv Or help people find it by giving a review or a rating on iTunes! http://bit.ly/1zhJnUj

This phrase, often used in porn, seems harmless, but what are we saying when we use it? How are men and women affected by standards of beauty that are portrayed in the porn industry and commercial culture? Appreciation: http://www.beautyredefined.net/lessons-from-porn-women-are-objects/ This article talks about how women and men are affected by the portrayal of women in pornography. Photoshopping real women into Cover models https://youtu.be/zRlpIkH3b5I “Dove Evolution” how a model is photoshopped for an ad. https://youtu.be/iYhCn0jf46U Check out the musical comedy Brick House Web Series at http://www.brickhousewebseries.com If you are listening to this, please let me know! http://brickhousewebseries.com/contact Also, follow on twitter @brickhousetv Or help people find it by giving a review or a rating on iTunes! http://bit.ly/1zhJnUj

The internet is full of porn, but Ben thinks that it is still not enough. He’ll tell you why that is, and also what happened recently when he had a relapse after 498 days of sobriety. Appreciation: Gary Wilson’s website: http://yourbrainonporn.com/ Also, check out Gary’s TED talk The Great Porn Experiment https://youtu.be/wSF82AwSDiU Check out the musical comedy Brick House Web Series at http://www.brickhousewebseries.com If you are listening to this, please let me know! http://brickhousewebseries.com/contact Also, follow on twitter @brickhousetv Or help people find it by giving a review or a rating on iTunes! http://bit.ly/1zhJnUj

Ben answers a question from Chris about when and how to tell a significant other about his porn habit. The answer is: it depends. But you should definitely tell. Appreciation: The NoFap (no masturbation) community at Reddit. Find some people who are struggling with the same thing you are. http://www.reddit.com/r/NoFap/ Check out the musical comedy Brick House Web Series at http://www.brickhousewebseries.com If you are listening to this, please let me know! http://brickhousewebseries.com/contact Also, follow on twitter @brickhousetv Or help people find it by giving a review or a rating on iTunes! http://bit.ly/1zhJnUj

The answer may not be what you think. In any case, it doesn’t help to feel guilt or shame about it. Ben continues his discussion with Jim from episode 9. Appreciation: Johann Hari article about real causes of addiction. Hopeful and fascinating. http://www.huffingtonpost.com/johann-hari/the-real-cause-of-addicti_b_6506936.html Check out the musical comedy Brick House Web Series at http://www.brickhousewebseries.com If you are listening to this, please let me know! http://brickhousewebseries.com/contact Also, follow on twitter @brickhousetv Or help people find it by giving a review or a rating on iTunes! http://bit.ly/1zhJnUj

Ben hasn’t watched it, but he still has a lot to say about it. What’s it like to be a recovering porn addict and be inundated with the media frenzy regarding a popular book and movie that is about a BDSM relationship? Here’s a movie that Ben recommends you watch instead: Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind http://youtu.be/lnSgSe2GzDc Appreciation: Free Ebook - Ten Keys to Breaking Pornography Addiction. http://www.no-porn.com/#!tenkeys/cjg9 Check out the musical comedy Brick House Web Series at http://www.brickhousewebseries.com If you are listening to this, please let me know! http://brickhousewebseries.com/contact Also, follow on twitter @brickhousetv Or help people find it by giving a review or a rating on iTunes! http://bit.ly/1zhJnUj

Ben Fraser was recently snowed in at a motel far from home with nothing to do. Triggers! Hear how he dealt with real triggers in real time, without relapsing! More advice for traveling porn free by Matt Dobschuetz: http://pornfreeradio.com/005-pornfree-travel-hotel-tips-and-trip-planning/ Appreciation: Ran Gavrieli Why I Stopped Watching Porn. http://youtu.be/gRJ_QfP2mhU Check out the musical comedy Brick House Web Series at http://www.brickhousewebseries.com If you are listening to this, please let me know! http://brickhousewebseries.com/contact Also, follow on twitter @brickhousetv Or give a review on iTunes! http://bit.ly/1zhJnUj

There’s a lot of laughing going on during this episode when Ben talks to a guy who uses humor to help ease the tension when talking about quitting porn. Jim quit looking at porn over 8 years ago, and is one of the key people who helped Ben quit himself. Appreciation: the Dalai Lama: https://www.facebook.com/DalaiLama Check out the musical comedy Brick House Web Series at http://www.brickhousewebseries.com I’d love to hear what you think: http://brickhousewebseries.com/contact Also, follow on twitter @brickhousetv Or give a review on iTunes! http://bit.ly/1zhJnUj Thanks for listening!

An original comedy radio play is featured this week. What happens when aliens try to attack Earth? How can the Earthlings resist if they are in a porn-induced stupor? Appreciation: The Power of Habit by Charles Duhigg http://www.powells.com/biblio/2-9780812981605-3 Check out the musical comedy Brick House Web Series at http://www.brickhousewebseries.com If you are finding the podcast useful, please rate us or give a review on iTunes! http://bit.ly/1zhJnUj

Ben Fraser talks about what he did to make it through one year without porn, including exercise, counseling, compassion for yourself, and not counting days. Appreciation: Matt Dobschuetz at http://www.PornfreeRadio.com Craig Perra http://www.themindfulhabit.com/ Brick House Web Series http://www.brickhousewebseries.com If you are finding the podcast useful, please rate us or give a review on iTunes! http://bit.ly/1zhJnUj

Telling stories of early struggles can be a great step in the recovery process. Combine porn magazines, a sex education book, and feelings of isolation and shame, what do you get? But it’s not your fault. Watch the Web Series http://www.brickhousewebseries.com If you are finding the podcast useful, please rate us or give a review on iTunes! http://bit.ly/1zhJnUj

Ben Fraser talks about the word “addiction” in regards to a porn habit, and says why he thinks it applies to himself. And how is compassion related to addiction? Links: Dr. Gabor Maté’s book “In the Realm of the Hungry Ghosts” http://bit.ly/1xtVs6E Fantastic article about addiction: http://huff.to/1yLbpIi Excellent discussion of “Porn Addiction Myth” by Luke Gilkerson (Covenant Eyes) http://bit.ly/1Bm9yIG Controversial article by Dr. David Ley - “Porn is not the Problem” http://bit.ly/1mbYPJd The Web Series (including the song “I’m Not an Addict”) http://www.brickhousewebseries.com If you are finding the podcast useful, please rate us or give a review on iTunes! http://bit.ly/1zhJnUj

Telling our stories can be a way to end feelings of isolation. You may recognize yourself in Ben's story of how he first encountered pornography as a kid, and how it led to addiction. Yes, there was a time before porn! For more, go to http://www.brickhousewebseries.com If you’re enjoying it, please subscribe and give a rating or review on iTunes. http://bit.ly/1zhJnUj Thanks for listening!

Reasons Ben Fraser quit porn. If you are trying to quit, you may sometimes forget why you are doing it. Here are some reasons that have been useful to Ben in his recovery. What are some reasons that have worked for you? Add your comments in iTunes, or on Soundcloud. https://soundcloud.com/ben-fraser-19/003-why-i-quit-porn To watch the webseries, go to http://www.brickhousewebseries.com If you like this podcast, please rate it or review on iTunes: http://bit.ly/1zhJnUj

How do you deal with the feelings that come up when you quit an addiction? Ben Fraser gives you some tips. More info at http://www.brickhousewebseries.com If you like this podcast, please rate or review it at iTunes: http://bit.ly/1zhJnUj

Ben Fraser talks about how quitting porn is like the Hero's Journey as described by Joseph Campbell. What is your "Call to Adventure?" Who are your allies? Who are your enemies? Watch the webseries: http://bit.ly/1zajKTJ More at: http://www.brickhousewebseries.com Hero's Journey: http://www.thewritersjourney.com/hero's_journey.htm If you like this podcast, please rate us or review on iTunes: http://bit.ly/1zhJnUj