Futility Closet

When Ewart Grogan was denied permission to marry his sweetheart, he set out to walk the length of Africa to prove himself worthy of her. In this week's episode of the Futility Closet podcast we'll find out whether Ewart's romantic quest succeeded. We'll also get an update on the criminal history of Donald Duck's hometown, and try to figure out how a groom ends up drowning on his wedding night. Sources for our segment on Ewart Grogan's traversal of Africa: Ewart Scott Grogan and Arthur Henry Sharp, From the Cape to Cairo: The First Traverse of Africa From South to North, 1902. Edward Paice, Lost Lion of Empire: The Life of Cape-to-Cairo Grogan, 2001. Julian Smith, Crossing the Heart of Africa: An Odyssey of Love and Adventure, 2010. Norman Wymer, The Man from the Cape, 1959. Martin Dugard, The Explorers, 2014. Brian O'Brien, "All for the Love of a Lady," in The Best of Field and Stream: 100 Years of Great Writing from America's Premier Sporting Magazine, 2002. "One Incredibly Long Church Aisle," Times Higher

In 1897, Swedish patent engineer S.A. Andrée set out in a quixotic bid to reach the North Pole in a hydrogen balloon, departing from Norway with two companions and hoping to drift over the top of the world and come down somewhere in the Bering Strait. Instead the expedition vanished. In this episode of the Futility Closet podcast we'll learn what happened to the Eagle and its three brave passengers, and consider the role of hindsight in the writing of history. We'll also learn what the White House planned to do if Neil Armstrong became stranded on the moon, and puzzle over why seeing a plane flying upside down would impact a woman's job. Sources for our segment on S.A. Andrée's attempt to reach the North Pole by balloon: Henri Lachambre and Alexis Machuron, Andrée and His Balloon, 1898. George Palmer Putnam, Andrée: The Record of a Tragic Adventure, 1930. Swedish Society for Anthropology and Geology, Andrée's Story, 1930. Swedish Society for Anthropology and Geology, The Andrée Diaries, 1931. Alec Wilkinson,

As a young man, Benjamin Franklin drew up a "plan for attaining moral perfection" based on a list of 13 virtues. Half a century later he credited the plan for much of his success in life. In this episode of the Futility Closet podcast we'll explore Franklin's self-improvement plan and find out which vices gave him the most trouble. We'll also learn how activist Natan Sharansky used chess to stay sane in Soviet prisons and puzzle over why the Pentagon has so many bathrooms. Sources for our segment on Benjamin Franklin's 13 virtues: Benjamin Franklin, Autobiography, 1791. Gordon S. Wood, The Americanization of Benjamin Franklin, 2005. Dinah Birch, ed., The Oxford Companion to English Literature, 2009. Here's Franklin's list of virtues: Temperance. Eat not to dullness; drink not to elevation. Silence. Speak not but what may benefit others or yourself; avoid trifling conversation. Order. Let all your things have their places; let each part of your business have its time. Resolution. Resolve to perform what you

(Image: Wikimedia Commons) In this episode of the Futility Closet podcast we'll tell how Spanish authorities found an ingenious way to use orphans to bring the smallpox vaccine to the American colonies in 1803. The Balmis Expedition overcame the problems of transporting a fragile vaccine over a long voyage and is credited with saving at least 100,000 lives in the New World. We'll also get some listener updates to the Lady Be Good story and puzzle over why a man would find it more convenient to drive two cars than one. Sources for our segment on the Balmis expedition: J. Antonio Aldrete, "Smallpox Vaccination in the Early 19th Century Using Live Carriers: The Travels of Francisco Xavier de Balmis," Southern Medical Journal, April 2004. Carlos Franco-Paredes, Lorena Lammoglia and José Ignacio Santos-Preciado, "The Spanish Royal Philanthropic Expedition to Bring Smallpox Vaccination to the New World and Asia in the 19th Century," Clinical Infectious Diseases, Nov. 1, 2005. Catherine Mark and José G. Rigau-Pérez

The American bomber Lady Be Good left North Africa for a bombing run over Italy in 1943. It wasn't seen again until 15 years later, when explorers discovered its broken remains deep in the Libyan desert. In this episode of the Futility Closet podcast we'll review the strange history of the lost aircraft and trace the desperate last days of its nine crewmen. We'll also climb some twisted family trees and puzzle over the Greek philosopher Thales' struggles with a recalcitrant mule. Sources for our segment on the Lady Be Good: Mario Martinez, Lady's Men, 1995. Dennis E. McClendon, The Lady Be Good: Mystery Bomber of World War II, 1962. Above: The Lady Be Good as she was discovered 440 miles southeast of Benghazi, in remarkably good condition for a plane that had landed itself with one working engine and then lain in the desert for 15 years. The tires on the nose wheel and one of the main landing wheels were undamaged and fully inflated. The crew:  William J. Hatton, pilot; Robert F. Toner, co-pilot; D.P. Hays,

In 1872 the British merchant ship Mary Celeste was discovered drifting and apparently abandoned 600 miles off the coast of Portugal. In this episode of the Futility Closet podcast we'll review this classic mystery of the sea: Why would 10 people flee a well-provisioned, seaworthy ship in fine weather? We'll also get an update on the legal rights of apes and puzzle over why a woman would not intervene when her sister is drugged. Sources for our segment on the Mary Celeste: Paul Begg, Mary Celeste: The Greatest Mystery of the Sea, 2005. Charles Edey Fay, Mary Celeste: The Odyssey of an Abandoned Ship, 1942. J.L. Hornibrook, "The Case of the 'Mary Celeste': An Ocean Mystery," Chambers Journal, Sept. 17, 1904. Listener mail: George M. Walsh, "Chimpanzees Don't Have The Same Rights As Humans, New York Court Rules," Associated Press, Dec. 5, 2014. The opinion from the New York Supreme Court, Appellate Division: The People of the State of New York ex rel. The Nonhuman Rights Project, Inc., on Behalf of Tommy, Appel

Here are eight new lateral thinking puzzles that you can try on your friends and family over the holidays -- see who can make sense of these odd scenarios using only yes-or-no questions. Please consider becoming a patron of Futility Closet -- on our Patreon page you can pledge any amount per episode, and all contributions are greatly appreciated. You can change or cancel your pledge at any time, and we've set up some rewards to help thank you for your support. You can also make a one-time donation via the PayPal button in the sidebar of the website. You can listen using the player above, download this episode directly, or subscribe on iTunes or via the RSS feed at http://feedpress.me/futilitycloset. If you have any questions or comments you can reach us at podcast@futilitycloset.com. Thanks for listening!

In 1768, Catherine the Great ordered her subjects to move a 3-million-pound granite boulder intact into Saint Petersburg to serve as the pedestal for a statue of Peter the Great. In this episode of the Futility Closet podcast we'll learn how some inspired engineering moved the Thunder Stone 13 miles from its forest home to Senate Square, making it the largest stone ever moved by man. We'll also learn whether mutant squid are attacking Indiana and puzzle over why a stamp collector would be angry at finding a good bargain. Our segment on the Thunder Stone is based on Yale linguist Alexander M. Schenker's impeccably researched 2003 history The Bronze Horseman: Falconet's Monument to Peter the Great. Here's an engraving by Louis-Nicolas van Blarenberghe, The Barge With the Thunder Rock Steadied by Two Cutters of the Imperial Navy En Route to St. Petersburg: Listener mail: Intrepid listener Dan Noland has found five newspaper articles on Indiana's oil pit squids -- his page includes background information and co

For most of the 20th century, a man in black appeared each year at the grave of Edgar Allan Poe. In the predawn hours of January 19, he would drink a toast with French cognac and leave behind three roses in a distinctive arrangement. No one knows who he was or why he did this. In this episode of the Futility Closet podcast we'll review the history of the "Poe Toaster" and his long association with the great poet's memorial. We'll also consider whether Winnie-the-Pooh should be placed on Ritalin and puzzle over why a man would shoot an unoffending monk. Sources for our segment on the Poe Toaster: "Mystery Man's Annual Visit to Poe Grave," China Daily, Jan. 20, 2008. "Poe Toaster Remains a Mystery," WBAL Radio, Jan. 19, 2013. "'Toaster' Rejects French Cognac at Poe's grave," Washington Times, Jan. 19, 2004. Sarah Brumfield, "Poe Fans Call an End to 'Toaster' Tradition," AP News, Jan. 19, 2012. Liz F. Kay, "Poe Toaster Tribute Is 'Nevermore'," Baltimore Sun, Jan. 19, 2010. Michael Madden, "Yes, Virginia, There

In 1835 the New York Sun announced that astronomers had discovered bat-winged humanoids on the moon, as well as reindeer, unicorns, bipedal beavers and temples made of sapphire. The fake news was reprinted around the world, impressing even P.T. Barnum; Edgar Allan Poe said that "not one person in ten" doubted the story. In this episode of the Futility Closet podcast we'll review the Great Moon Hoax, the first great sensation of the modern media age. We'll also learn why Montana police needed a rabbi and puzzle over how a woman's new shoes end up killing her. Sources for our segment on the Great Moon Hoax: Matthew Goodman, The Sun and the Moon, 2008. The Museum of Hoaxes has an excellent summary of the hoax and its significance in media history, including the text of all six articles. Listener mail: Lauren May, "Terrified Banstead Family Confronted by 'Dark Figure' on Bypass," Epsom Guardian, Feb. 23, 2012. Michael Munro, "'The Springer' Leaps From WW2 Urban Legend to Anti-Fascist Superhero," io9, Sept. 3, 20

For this Thanksgiving episode of the Futility Closet podcast, enjoy seven lateral thinking puzzles that didn't make it onto our regular shows. Solve along with us as we explore some strange scenarios using only yes-or-no questions. Happy Thanksgiving! You can listen using the player above, download this episode directly, or subscribe on iTunes or via the RSS feed at http://feedpress.me/futilitycloset. If you have any questions or comments you can reach us at podcast@futilitycloset.com. Thanks for listening!

Between 1837 and 1904, rumors spread of a strange bounding devil who haunted southern England, breathing blue flames and menacing his victims with steel talons. In this episode of the Futility Closet podcast we review the career of Spring-Heeled Jack and speculate about his origins. We also recount Alexander Graham Bell's efforts to help the wounded James Garfield before his doctors' treatments could kill him and puzzle over why a police manual gives instructions in a language that none of the officers speak. Source for our segment on Spring-Heeled Jack: Mike Dash, "Spring-Heeled Jack: To Victorian Bugaboo From Suburban Ghost," Fortean Studies 3 (1996). Sources for our segment on Alexander Graham Bell and James Garfield: Candice Millard, Destiny of the Republic: A Tale of Madness, Medicine and the Murder of a President, 2011. Amanda Schaffer, "A President Felled by an Assassin and 1880's Medical Care," New York Times, July 25, 2006. You can listen using the player above, download this episode directly, or su

Abraham Lincoln's eldest son, Robert, is the subject of a grim coincidence in American history: He's the only person known to have been present or nearby at the assassinations of three American presidents. In this episode of the Futility Closet podcast we describe the circumstances of each misfortune and explore some further coincidences regarding Robert's brushes with fatality. We also consider whether a chimpanzee deserves a day in court and puzzle over why Australia would demolish a perfectly good building. Sources for our segment on Robert Todd Lincoln: Jason Emerson, Giant in the Shadows: The Life of Robert T. Lincoln, 2012. Charles Lachman, The Last Lincolns: The Rise and Fall of a Great American Family, 2008. Merrill D. Peterson, Lincoln in American Memory, 1994. Ralph Gary, Following in Lincoln's Footsteps, 2002. Sources for the listener mail segment: "Lyman Dillon and the Military Road," Tri-County Historical Society (accessed 11/06/2014). Charles Siebert, "Should a Chimp Be Able to Sue Its Owner?",

In August 1977, Ohio astronomer Jerry Ehman discovered a radio signal so exciting that he wrote "Wow!" in the margin of its computer printout. Arriving from the direction of the constellation Sagittarius, the signal bore all the characteristics of an alien transmission. But despite decades of eager listening, astronomers have never heard it repeated. In this episode of the Futility Closet podcast we'll review the story of the "Wow! signal," which remains an intriguing, unexplained anomaly in the search for extraterrestrial intelligence. We'll also share some more nuggets from Greg's database of oddities and puzzle over why a man chooses to drive a long distance at only 15 mph. Sources for our segment on the Wow! signal: Robert H. Gray, The Elusive Wow, 2012. Giuseppe Cocconi and Philip Morrison, "Searching for Interstellar Communication," Nature, Sept. 19, 1959. Frank White, The SETI Factor, 1990. David W. Swift, SETI Pioneers, 1990. David Darling, The Extraterrestrial Encyclopedia, 2000. Michael Brooks, 13

For 500 years of European history, animals were given criminal trials: Bulls, horses, dogs, and sheep were arrested, jailed, given lawyers, tried, and punished at community expense. In the latest Futility Closet podcast we'll explore this strange practice and try to understand its significance to the people of the time. We'll also rediscover the source of Futility Closet's name and puzzle over how a ringing bell relates to a man's death. Sources for our segment on animal trials: Anila Srivastava, "'Mean, Dangerous, and Uncontrollable Beasts': Mediaeval Animal Trials," Mosaic, March 2007. Jen Girgen, "The Historical and Contemporary Prosecution and Punishment of Animals," Animal Law Review, 2003. Esther Cohen, "Law, Folklore, and Animal Lore," Past & Present, February 1986. "Medieval Animal Trials," medievalists.net, Sept. 8, 2013 (accessed Oct. 20, 2014). James E. McWilliams, "Beastly Justice," Slate, Feb. 21, 2013. E.P. Evans, The Criminal Prosecution and Capital Punishment of Animals, 1906. The Hour of

Nova Scotia's Oak Island hides a famously booby-trapped treasure cache -- or so goes the legend. In this episode of the Futility Closet podcast, we review the many attempts to recover the treasure and wonder who could have engineered such a site, what might be hidden there -- and whether, indeed, it contains anything at all. We also puzzle over what a woman's errands can tell us about how her husband died. Sources for our segment on Oak Island: "The Secrets of Oak Island", Joe Nickell, Skeptical Inquirer, March/April 2000. Richard Joltes, "History, Hoax, and Hype: The Oak Island Legend", Critical Enquiry, accessed Oct. 19, 2014. Edwin Teale, "Mystery Island Baffles Treasure Hunters," Popular Science, May 1939. D'Arcy O'Connor, The Money Pit, 1978. The image above shows the dig as it existed in August 1931. Below is 27-year-old Franklin Roosevelt (third from right) at the 1909 dig:   This week's lateral thinking puzzle was contributed by listener Nicholas Madrid. You can listen using the player above, downloa

In 1828, a 16-year-old boy appeared in Nuremberg, claiming that he'd spent his whole life alone in a dark cell. In the latest Futility Closet podcast we'll follow the short, sad life of Kaspar Hauser and ponder who he might have been. We'll also revisit the Pacific Northwest Tree Octopus, encounter some self-landing planes, and puzzle over why a man would bury 15 luxury cars in the desert. Sources for our segment on Kaspar Hauser: Jeffrey Moussaieff Masson, Lost Prince: The Unsolved Mystery of Kaspar Hauser, 1996. Martin Kitchen, Kaspar Hauser: Europe's Child, 2001. Links from listener mail: Being in the Shadow, Australian psychologist Kate Russo's site about the psychology of eclipse chasing. A 1997 NTSB report regarding a Piper PA-24 that "landed itself" after the pilot passed out due to a carbon monoxide leak. The "cornfield bomber," a Convair F-106 Delta Dart that landed in a Montana farmer's field in 1970 after the pilot ejected. When the local sheriff arrived, the jet's engine was still idling. This wee

Sherlock Holmes was based on a real man, a physician who trained Arthur Conan Doyle at the University of Edinburgh. During his medical lectures, Joseph Bell regularly astonished his students with insights into his patients' lives and characters. "From close observation and deduction, gentlemen," he said, "it is possible to make a diagnosis that will be correct in any and every case. However, you must not neglect to ratify your deductions." In this episode of the Futility Closet podcast we'll meet Joseph Bell and review the stories of his legendary acuity. We'll also take a tour through Greg's database of unpublished oddities and puzzle over how having your car damaged might be a good thing. Our segment on Joseph Bell, the inspiration for Sherlock Holmes, was based on Northeastern Illinois University literature professor Ely Liebow's 1982 book Dr. Joe Bell: Model for Sherlock Holmes. Our original post on Joseph Bell ran on April 27, 2014. Harry How's 1892 Strand feature "A Day With Dr. Conan Doyle" is reprint

In September 1940 Polish army captain Witold Pilecki volunteered to be imprisoned at Auschwitz. His reports first alerted the Allies to the horrors at the camp and helped to warn the world that a holocaust was taking place. In this episode of the Futility Closet podcast we'll follow Pilecki into the camp, hear his reports of the atrocities he witnessed, and learn why his name isn't better known today. We'll also meet the elusive Pacific Northwest Tree Octopus and puzzle over how hitting a target could save thousands of lives. Sources for our segment on Polish army captain Witold Pilecki: The Auschwitz Volunteer: Beyond Bravery. By Witold Pilecki, translated by Jarek Garlinski, 2012. Timothy Snyder, "Were We All People?", New York Times, June 22, 2012. "Meet The Man Who Sneaked Into Auschwitz," National Public Radio, Sept. 18, 2010. Listener mail: The hoax site on the Pacific Northwest Tree Octopus was created by these researchers at the University of Connecticut. (Thanks to listener David Brooks for telling

In 1810 someone told hundreds of London merchants that Mrs. Tottenham at 54 Berners Street had requested their services. She hadn't. For a full day the street was packed with crowds of deliverymen struggling to reach a single door -- and the practical joker was never caught. In this episode of the Futility Closet podcast we'll hear descriptions of the chaos in Berners Street and meet Theodore Hook, the man who probably planned the whole thing. We'll also revisit the mysterious corpse found on an Australian beach in 1948 and puzzle over an octopus stuck in a tree. Sources for our segment on the Berners Street hoax: Judith Flanders, The Victorian City: Everyday Life in Dickens' London, 2012. Robert Chambers, The Book of Days, 1832. Theodore Hook, The Life and Remains of Theodore Edward Hook, 1849. John Gibson Lockhart, Theodore Hook, A Sketch, 1852. John Timbs, Lives of Wits and Humourists, 1862. Satirist, or, Monthly Meteor, "The Hoax: An Epistle From Solomon Sappy, Esquire, in London, to his brother Simon at