Those Damn Ross Kids

Wherein those damn Ross kids talk about children’s books, citizenship, and deer. Suggested Talking Points: We have an intro already (the worst person). Little Bear slaughtered the Boxcar Children. Take these nude pics of me, Mom. Moonwalk at gunpoint. Take my eye. Snacks around the world. Stealing a bridge one piece at a time. YouTube Challenges. Expatriates. The Man Who Quit Money. FOSAMA. Eagle steals dog. Ira Glass impersonation. Deer are basically big stupid rats. The Joey Bra. I am my own mother.

Wherein those damn Ross kids talk about matricide, conditions, and the surrogate Kole. Kole was incredibly inebriated for this episode. Forgiveness please. Suggested Talking Points: Pirates on deck. Keep that sex offender away from my grandma. Robots, Men, and Sex Tourism. I’ve got your daughter’s ashes, and I’m gonna snort them. Helicopter Women. The Aztec prison code. Racism Museum. A Tea Parody. Trig. Immaculate chicken conception. The death of Engrish. 50 Year Old Great Grandma and the 5th of Beam. The Science Zone: Brain Freeze. Pee in this cup.

Wherein those damn Ross kids talk about substances, minerals, and childhood crime. Suggested Talking Points: Bulk bag. Chinplant Mania. Coke overdose. Accura: Not Too Dark. Shred your toads. I can get a handgun if I want. Rename this pond. Phantom genitalia. SCIENCE ZONE: Jimmy C and the Asteroid Mine. Kindergarten simple assault. I want my foreskin back.

Wherein those damn Ross kids talk about eyewear, odors, and golf. Suggested Talking Points: We’re not having the same conversation. Bleach fights and soap stories. The nerd defense. The panties of neglected Japanese wives. Fantasy maid service. OTR is dissed. Alicia Silverstone, the mama bird. I do… Stab you. They stole my lawn. Buford for sale. Golfing in the DMZ. THE SCIENCE ZONE: What would you give up for the internet? Toot for me. Shroom rage.

Wherein those damn Ross kids talk about sleeping disorders, novelty food, and the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. Suggested Talking Points: Deep nosing. Sexsomnia. Hunger Games Robots. The Boom Stick Hotdog. Big Pop. A Hill of Beans. Hootie’s bag crimes. PSA: Ticks! S.O.S.: Save Our Swan. Homekill gone wrong. That’s a paddlin’. Ruining the Turtles. SCIENCE ZONE: Coregasms. Dial-a-Star.

Wherein those damn Ross kids talk about conveyance, fragrances, supernatural spelling. Suggested Talking Points: Isolation chamber. Kazakhstan demands a full investigation. 5 pounds of heroin in your tummy. Don’t legislate my penis. Eau de Pope. Sex toys, minus shame. Tacocopter. I’m so sorry potato potato potato. Science Zone: Flies, Rejection, Alcoholism, and cooked by bees. They made me handle the bomb. Quija murder me.

Wherein those damn Ross kids talk about volume, aviation, and discipline. ALSO: Needle Hand. Whispering coach. Charles Bronson in the Love Guru. The Shut-Up Gun. Arson spree night out. Silent Halls. Just kill anyone. HitmanForHire.com. Gas leak infidelity. The desire to piss outside. Your sexy is too right. Atta boy. I love you, Lady Liberty. Nuclear bank robbery.

Wherein those damn Ross kids talk about lives cut tragically short, Denny’s, and Cheers. Suggested Talking Points: Car wash stomp. Mohel herpes. Middle school murder. Rear-view cameras to be required. This is my Denny’s now. DUI and a butt plug. Drunk zamboni driver. Finance your test tube baby. SCIENCE ZONE: Clever Shark. Beeping Cheers and Barium White.

Wherein those damn Ross kids talk about ancient candies, life hacks, and condiments. Suggested Talking Points: A podcast called Wanda. The worst story. Atomic fireballs. Community guns. Life Hacks: Claw Machine Tips. Tax loophole incest? The Reese’s Robber. Hazard pay for rape. Science Zone: Again and Again. Tighter in France. Salsa Bandit. Paid to attend.

Wherein those damn Ross kids talk about being subdued, the logistics of chainsaw murder, and cheap beer. Suggested Talking Points: No intro. Panty study. Heart Attack Grill. The logistics of chainsaw murder. Pong Beer Pong. Duff Beer. Outlawing cheap beer. My other personality did it. Buy this stall. Dead Rhino. Science Zone: Ringtones make you stupid. Trunk escapades.

Wherein those damn Ross kids talk about new formats, bullying, and career decisions. uggested Talking Points: Continuing the format. Self immolation. When pajamas are outlawed. What does your wardrobe say about you? Monster is laying people off. No Name-Calling Day. The Most Overrated Thing. Shake and Bake. Gone Hookin’. Morgellons is Fake. Cool to DJ? Understanding Terrorism. An unending parade of Steves. No music.

Wherein those damn Ross kids talk about the human heart, dangerous games, and travel. Suggested Talking Points: Routine. Home births up, and the Great Outdoors. Two hearts. Gay marry this building. My Prius is Melting. Beer halls. The Toylet and up skirt epidemic. What grade would you go back to? I married my dead girlfriend. You and three other people. The Choking Game (Space Monkey). What kind of battery? A webshow. Airplane announcement hijinks.

Wherein those damn Ross kids talk about wizards, economics, and drinking. Suggested Talking Points: Spoiler: He Never Leaves. Marijuana Wizards. No more pets. Drunk pilots and the Estrada Conspiracy. Foodstamps for people who hate poor people. Great Accomplishment in Butts. Remote control eye gouge. TV Bosses. The Science Zone: The Price is Wrong, and dying of a broken heart. Dissolve that mouse. Reverse art theft. Radioactive Tissue Boxes. A stark portrait of binge drinkers.

Wherein those damn Ross kids talk about semantics, art theft, and body image. Suggested Talking Points: The Geek Squad. Mission Statement. No matter how slight. Shame on you, Owen Wilson. Ghetto-averse GPS. The great ranch conspiracy. I’ll eat you and your dog / Cannibalism is sexy. My bum is on the painting. Facebook makes you sad. Spot the Fake: CES Gadgets. Cancer Barbie. Science Zone: Shit Spray, and the coughed-up tumor. Hammer Time for Judge Judy.

Wherein those damn Ross kids talk about bodily functions, fantasy, and currency. Suggested Talking Points: Belch Brothers. The Santa Shortcut. Back room liposuction. Upside-down childbirth. Drunk impulse buying. A lepidopterist of knives. The healing bag. Tech jokes. Exploding churros, and an explanation of grease fires. Is this hooking? Science Zone: Exoskeletons and group sex. A million dollar bill. The problem with exact change.

Wherein those damn Ross kids talk about pronunciation, coffee, and martians. Suggested Talking Points: Dark and windy. Francis Frostman. Ungyun. Banished words 2011. Smurf Town. New Year’s Bird Panic. Gay Coffee. The Grand Target Nurse-In. Rashomon, and the American Hero. SCIENCE ZONE: 2011 Ig Nobel Prizes, and useless antidepressants. Barack Obama: The Original Martian. Powerball Price Hike. Facebook divorces.

Wherein those damn Ross kids talk about swimming pools, elitism, and public safety. Suggested Talking Points: I’m not on the microphone. “Public Swimming Pool. Whites Only”. A long time ago, in a parking lot far, far away. Scent of a Woman With Gonorrhea. Muggers only want iPhones. Designer vaginas. Highway to Rapeton. Here, have these spiders. Runaway implant. Tebowing is illegal. Dance Floor Danger. The Science Zone: Birds in Danger.

Wherein those damn Ross kids talk about assault, Christmas memories, and possession. Suggested Talking Points: Ridin’ the fadaz. Are you okay? God was a hard act to follow. Give me Bieber or DIE. A sad story about people attempting to make light of rape. Kole’s frat experience. Bear-y the Cable Guy. Make-A-Meth. A Call From Karlo, and Christmas Memories. Get poked and prodded for profit! SCIENCE ZONE: Radioactive monkey collars, strep throat psychology. CNN Health Asks.

Wherein those damn Ross kids talk about spontaneous combustion, parasites, and swearing. Suggested Talking Points: Pungee spikes and a Hollywood Education. Burst into flames for no apparent reason. A tragic misunderstanding with a gun and AIDS. Voicemail: Chiggers? The butt hi-jinks threat mishap. SCIENCE ZONE: Photoshop sensor, and curses as painkillers. CNN Health Roulette. Gimme a bloody ice cream. Multichete. Dope.shrunk.

Wherein those damn Ross kids talk about misguided holiday cheer, atheism, and cellular hygiene. Suggested Talking Points: Pure Imagination. Ombudsmen. Frosty attacks! Michael Keaton is the Sean Connery of Batman. Snakes alive! Where are they getting this acid? Homeless library porn. K-Mart panty scandal. Birdseed santeria spell. Atheists found to be less trustworthy than rapists. Jesus: Don’t take that wheel. Don’t touch that phone, it’s gross. Philosophical quandaries and the college trap. Science Zone: Printer Security. Let me out of this freezer, please, I’m not dead.