Ze Shows Anime Pulse

Giant monster fight the movie better known as Godzilla Vs Kong[2021]. It just came out and we drove to Texas to enjoy some pre-2019 theater experience for it. So you’d all better be grateful that we did that very real thing in order to bring you an unwanted review. There’s Kong, who’s older and bigger now so the fight isn’t one sided. Godzilla attacks Florida, presumably because Florida-man sold him some cut bath salts. The not-an-evil-corporation headquartered there was definitely not making a Mechagodzilla using the skulls of King Ghidorah. There are also humans wandering about, stealing screen time. We’re certain this is because they’re compelling and not because it’s cheaper than … Continue reading Popcorn Pulse 149: Honest to GOd →

The working version. Stephen King has a long history with adaptations of his work. No small amount of it has been decent to good books being turned into movies that are best described as “free, please take”. Is this a problem with trying to cram a book big enough to beat a rhino into submission into ninety minutes? We attempt to find out by watching Mangler and Cat’s Eye. The Mangler is, inexplicably, a movie based on the short story about a laundry machine that gets possessed. The story is quaint and functional considering that it was written in the seventies for a fiction magazine. The movie though is a pure mess with Robert … Continue reading Script 2 Script 24: King Stuff →

From a mystery box, whence no one knows it came. We drew from it a pair of books, the like of which we had never lain eyes. An ethereal brilliance reached out and blinded us for an instant. Like a dream, the light was gone. Leaving us to wake up in a smoking crater. Tim has Final Fantasy Type-0. It has Final Fantasy in the name so you know it has crystals, magic mumbling, and an evil Empire. There’s a group of super powerful students call class zero. They do something and fight the empire who are bad. Though they may accidentally make the Empire out to be sympathetic. It still gets … Continue reading Manga Pulse 444: Fantasy King →

This week on Anime Pulse we got giant lizards stomping around, dumping radioactive water into the ocean, and hospital bills are too damn high. Up first Joseph is trying to get some answers as to why his bill for visit to an emergency room is going to send him to another, and Andrew gets hit with some anime swag and gets ready to delve into yet another Monster Hunter game. Then the industry news brings in topics about more fishy thefts, Aniplex being shit, and Mobile Suit Netflix. Lastly the previews have Joseph not-isekai to a super realistic game world where he is the Demon Lord, and Andrew pilots a giant robot with his friends to fight Godzilla.

Let’s talk tax evasion instead of movies. You know how any number of actors or musicians have tried to avoid taxes by not paying them? The director of today’s film decided to skip that and just give up his US citizenship. So we have Terry Gilliam’s Imaginarium of Dr. Parnassus[2009]. It’s a story about an ancient monk who’s made deals with the devil throughout the ages. Culminating in him having one go at mortality and having to pay the devil with his daughter. It’s a lot of wild imagery and works well around the death of Heath Ledger who was to be the protagonist. Tim has Suburban Sasquatch[2004]. You know how independent films are … Continue reading Popcorn Pulse 148: Black Face →

We’ve got too many manga and the dump won’t take it. We’ve tried donating it and got cited for toxic waste. I supposed that there’s only one thing to do. Time to crack open a couple of them and start reviewing them. Then we can use them as kindling. Tim has a manhua with Peerless Little Doctor. Our protagonist, Dr. Pokey, is getting kicked out of medical school for fighting. Lucky for him he gets a magical tome which says he can still be a respected doctor by using his innate acupuncture skills. We then get what may be a flash back where he uses pressure points to cure his mothers brain edema. … Continue reading Manga Pulse 443: Spy Little →

This week on Anime Pulse we got recycling with the power of a burning finger, being possessed by the ancient spirit of a samurai, and the most cultured talk about fan service in anime ever. Up first Joseph is surrounding himself with Tharjas, and Andrew's weather is hot and cold and then hot again. Afterwards there's news of another strange theft, China gets it's first new anime since 2007, and horrible women in a terrible anime wear sexy undergarments. Lastly the previews make a return as Joseph gets teased so hard he takes in a girl off the street, and Andrew allows the spirit of a samurai to possess him and battle football players.

Let’s dig into the best year to ever have occurred in the history of our lives. At least that’s what we’re going to call it based solely on the films that came out that year. We’re not going for anything most people have heard of though, we’ve got The Miracle Fighters(1982). It’s a fantasy Kung Fu movie where we follow a kung fu master who gets betrayed, runs from the king, and raises a random child as his own. This kid then learns kung fu magic, which we dubbed FunKu, and competes to be recognized as a wizard. His rival is naturally the bat sorcerer who wanted to kill the prince. … Continue reading Popcorn Pulse 147: Double Miracle →

Two more for the wall. We’ve got two more slabs of paper pulp with words done printed on them for a trophy. Sometimes it feels like we’re never going to recapture that golden hunt, boyo. We’ll get there one day or die trying. Tim has Sleepless Domain. It’s an OEL which is apparently still a thing that companies publish. There are magical girls who protect a city at night from monsters. We follow a team of five who all die except for the water girl Undine. She discovers that there may be more than meets the eye. It’s painfully slow and the full color does nothing for it. Burn It. Weltall has Dragon’s … Continue reading Manga PUlse 442: Dragon’s Domain →

This week on Anime Pulse we got card thieves, the most annoying characters in anime, and going topless to fight aliens. Up first IRL news sees Joseph reach Platinum rank in Magic the Gathering: Arena, and Andrew cooked up another amazing meal for his family. Afterwards the news only brings us two whole topics of discussion, as a man steals a million yen worth of trading cards and a plagiarizing anime gets canned. Lately the reviews show us out with Joseph using science to fight magic while falling in love with the enemy, and Andrew becomes a groupie for the pilot of an elite space alien fighting force.

There are some actors who are like the white rice of film. Then there are tried and true spices like garlic and you can never have too much garlic. The same could be said of one Nicolas Cage and we’ve got a dollar store can full in Willy’s Wonderland[2021]. Cage is the nameless protagonist who says nothing. A bold choice which leaves Cage to facially act his way through. He’s a stranger who has a mishap and the local mechanic offers to fix his car for a price. Stay the night in an ersatz pizza and animatronic family restaurant. When the FNAF critters come to life, Cage beats them to death. Tim takes a look … Continue reading Popcorn Pulse 146: Willy’s Wonderland →

How many manga can we cram into a single show? Could we do seven, fourteen, a hundred and eighty? Considering how long and rambly we get, it’s doubtful. We’re honestly lucky we get through the two we normally slate for these things. Speaking of two, that’s exactly what we brought in. Tim has Destroy All Humans They Can’t be Regenerated. A manga set in the late nineties based on Magic the Gathering. It employs actual cards and our hero is obsessed with playing black. This leads him to a comic shop where he spots the class president beating some older players. He manages to get her to play with him and teach … Continue reading Manga Pulse 441: Regenerated Manga →

It's a brand new show! Joseph and Andrew have quit Anime reviews, and are moving to the West to tackle cartoons. In our inaugural episode we talk about our favorite Western cartoons, a scared dog, and Sponge Bob getting a little too spicy for 2021. Up first we delve straight into the reviews because that's what you're here for, as Joseph attempts to defend his home in the middle of nowhere and Andrew hangs out with some very ugly aliens. Afterwards the guys talk turkey about their offline lives, with Joseph gloating over his bs Magic the Gathering Arena wins and Andrew doesn't have much to say. Lastly it is some news to sound us off and see us out the door, with Canada pointing the finger at an animated Bigfoot, some classics get brought to a little known platform, and a cupcake animated short straight from the bathrooms of bored animators.

Has it been awhile since we did a Travolta movie? Probably. No one cares for us to go back and look. We grabbed The Forger[2014] off the rack to see what travesty was produced. Travolta plays an Art Forger who’s son is dying of cancer. He calls in a favor from a mob boss to get out of jail early. This involves forging a Monet to steal and give to the mob. Travolta almost fits being a washed up wannabe artist who makes copies. Plus they don’t pull any punches and have the kid miraculously beat cancer at the end. Tim has Dragnet(1987). It features Dan Akroyd as the son of the original Joe Friday. He’s uptight … Continue reading Popcorn Pulse 145: The Last Forger →

Prepare for trouble. And you might as well make it a double. It’s been a long week since our last and that means it’s time to drink. If we have time we might fit in a little manga review or two as well. Tim has Doku Mushi – The Ruins Hotel. We have a group of paranormal investigators or something. They’re vaguely an occult club and they’re going to spend a couple of nights in an abandoned love hotel where shit went down. They find themselves locked in and someone might be trying to make them into a human Doku Mushi as they begin killing and torturing each other. It gets a Read It … Continue reading Manga PUlse 440: Heal Mushi →

This week on Anime Pulse we got tons of trading cards, Netflix being utterly droll, and descending deeper into the Abyss. Up first Joseph is excited for his trip to Flavor Town, and Andrew stuffs his face full of pocky and melon pan while watching cute girls doing cute things. Then the industry news rolls in with Japan tracking your every movement, a life size and possible Rei figurine, and how to avoid being canceled by a Japanese artist. Lastly the reviews sound us off as Joseph watches a cute girl doing demonic things, and Andrew take a dip in the Sea of Corpses.

What to do for movies. Shit, we know we watched something we could do. Fuck it, Nicholas Cage it is. Time to break out Vampire’s Kiss(1988). One of Cage’s first roles where he brings a woman home back to his place and starts making out with her. Things are going well enough to start undressing. At least until a bat comes in. He gets bit and goes a little loopy. Becoming convinced he’s turning into a vampire. This causes him to browbeat his secretary and yell at his therapist. If nothing else, this movie is at least the source of one of the best Cage faces, the “you don’t say face.” We … Continue reading Popcorn Pulse 144: Vampy Kisses →

Back to back is not just the optimal fighting technique when you have two Jean Claude van Damme. It’s also the way our reviews come along. This time more pulp of the paper directly from the land of the Subaru. Tim has The Church in Front of the Devil’s Castle. So you know the current stock setting of manga fantasy is what happens when Tolkien spends one drunk night in the back of a Mazda with a magical girl before flying back to Burrummsby. There’s an outpost in front of the demon king’s castle that will serve as a save point for the heroes on their way to the last battle. It’s watched … Continue reading Manga Pulse 439: Gun Devil →

This week on Anime Pulse we got trips to the Emergency Room, edible cups, and angry pandas. Up first is the IRL news with Joseph feeling like death, and Andrew asking us for a little sympathy for some anime characters. Afterwards comes the industry news with two straight shots from Joseph, about a super expensive Rei figurine you can hug and munching on nutty cups. And lastly are the reviews as Joseph raises some slimes, and Andrew starts up an office job with a bunch of anthropomorphized animals.

We remember how the DC film adaptations haven’t done too hot critically or financially. They’ve made their money but they’re very clearly on rocky ground. One of the exceptions was Wonder Woman. Which meant we had to talk about Wonder Woman 1984[2020] as it recently came out. Diana is farting around in the year 1984. You might think this would be an excuse to have fun 80’s references or music. No, Diana is working as an anthropologist and saving people without getting noticed. This is so the line about her disappearing for a century in Justice League still fits. A dude named Max Lord gets a wishing stone and uses his wish to turn himself … Continue reading Popcorn Pulse 143: Woman Hunter →