Deanne Smith's Questionable At Best

This week’s question: How could I just let you walk away? Just let you leave without a trace? This week’s quote: “I’m a contributing member of society and I do the god damn best I can.” (Or: “If you made me a delicious smoothie…I would probably take off my underwear.”) It’s solo podcast time! Sherwin Tija provided the questions and I answered them, meanderingly. Satisfy your curiosity about the weapon I’d like to master, the shape of my heart, and whether or not I can sing Miley Cyrus’s Party in the U.S.A. (I can’t.) I believe there’s a little nuggety gem of goodness for you in here if you listen to the very end, and like sappiness and fireflies.

This week’s question: What’s it like to be you? This week’s quote: “”I’m a fucking joy.” Do you know Brittani Nichols? Well, you’re about to. This conversation got real, fast. It’s also full of laughing. Hilarious realness, real hilariousness…your call.

This week’s question: Is there such a thing as being in a good place? This week’s quote: “”If you are someone without a sense of humor and you go into a dark place, you are truly one of God’s damned.” Nick and I sat in dark parked car somewhere in Lo-Ho and definitely didn’t answer this question. Somehow, though, I think this podcast ended up in a good place. Hopefully you agree. Warning: lots of giggling.

This week’s question: How much fun is being sober? This week’s quote: “Lots of fun. So much fun.” My buddy Dan and I talk about life after alcohol. It’s so much fun! But then again, so were those drinking days. Listen for Dan’s wisdom…and a few good stories from his past.

This week’s question: Am I right for you? This week’s quote: “We’re all just humans on this planet. Put a smile on it.” With podcast hour upon me and with nothing recorded this week, I headed to the internet for inspiration. Instead of one question, we have 50 (well, 26), from Thought Catalog’s article “50 Questions to Ask Your Crush to See if They’re Right for You.” I recommend asking your crush none of these questions; you’ll see why.

This week’s question: What’s up with cougars? This week’s quote: “FINE. Let’s embrace this.” We talked about the ladies, not the giant cats. Actually, we talked about the term cougar, and animal print clothing. And Dayna’s very cool performance art piece. Dig in. Check out Daynarama.com to see Dayna’s portfolio, and CougarThis.com for an archive of her project. (And that sweet photo? It was taken by Pierre Dalpé)

This week’s question: Is there a god? This week’s quote: “A conscious entity that’s decided to do this? That’s ridiculous.” A chick raised Episcopalian (don’t worry, I don’t know what that means either) and a former Jehovah’s witness kick around this doozy. And you know what? We come up with a pretty god damn (sorry) definitive answer.

This week’s question: How important is experience for good sex? This week’s quote: “It’s much easier than most people think.” This podcast sprang from a real-life conversation I was having with a smart, sex-positive friend. Within minutes, you’ll hear us decide that experience isn’t the most important thing for good sex. What is? Listen in. Emilie drops some practical wisdom. Oh, and if you need more places to visit on the internet, stop by Emilie’s blog at www.emilieblog.com

This week’s question: What are your resolutions? This week’s quote: “Are resolutions even a thing that people should be making?” This week’s is a solo podcast. Things tend to get weird and interesting when I’m alone in a room with a microphone. My new cat Tarzan makes an appearance, as does my actual, real-life phone number. WHY?! Don’t make me regret this. (I already do.) Also, I have a cold. You’ll hear that.

This week’s question: What’s up with your voice? This week’s quote: “I don’t speak very much in real life.” I spoke to an introverted drummer about all things voice. Speaking voice, singing voice, inner voice, The Voice…wow, that word looks weird the more I type it. Stayed tuned ’til the end for…well, you’ll see.

This week’s question: What’s better, penis or vagina? This week’s quote: “The vagina’s looking after itself.” My god, listen to this man’s voice. Let him tickle your ear holes with talk about “p”s and “v”s, as he so charmingly refers to them. OH! And there’s a bonus track at the end of this podcast, just for you. Stay ’til the very end, and be rewarded with “Ghost,” from Folly and the Hunter’s album Tragic Care. (Note: it is not explicitly about “p”s or “v”s.)

This week’s question: Should we have gotten these tattoos? This week’s quote: “Every tattoo you have is a reflection of that moment. It’s like a permanent diary on your skin.” A week after we got our tattoos, I chat with my tattoo life partners about ink, body hair, boats, and, uh, mortality.

This week’s question: What’s your damage? This week’s quote: “Free refills on coffee is the unconditional love of today.” Three folks sit on a vintage couch, drinks in hand, and talk about damage, the concept of unconditional love, and pancakes. Mmm…pancakes.

This week’s question: What have you done with your life? This week’s quote: “I filled a shelf on my bookshelf with goat’s milk soap. Wow. That makes me sound crazy.” What could have been a painfully introspective podcast turned quickly into a chat about kick-ass events of varying degrees of success: The Festival of Crying, Strip Spelling Bee, Slow Dance night, and a little something called Death Match. (Oh, and the Damien Rice song I mentioned is Cheers Darlin. Look it up.)  

This week’s question: Is everyone actually cooler than me? This week’s quote: “Apparently baking and clumsiness is not cool.” Sarah Quinn returns to the podcast to talk what and who’s cool. (Hint: probably musicians, and definitely not me.)

This week’s question: How well do you work with others? This week’s quote: “I feel like that’s all you really need. One good friend.” “If you’re a terrier or a small piece of fruit.” I got together for a dreamy chat with kick-ass humans Carly and Robin about collaboration. A miniature schnauzer got in the mix. He’s not the only tiny thing we’ll reference.

This week’s question: Where is there? This week’s quote: “Three years later I’m still here and I feel like I just got here.” I chat with a self-proclaimed “deep-voiced rando” about…well, a lot of stuff. What it means to be here or there, the concept of “bevlege,” and the accidental (or is it?) profundity of Siri.

This week’s question:  What are the kids up to these days? This week’s quote:  “I don’t like clothes on stuffed animals. It’s just wrong.” My little pal and I have a free-flowing chat. Listen in for new slang for stuffed animals, dragon descriptions, musings on the afterlife, and at least two references to decapitation.

This week’s question: What’s the point of any of it? This week’s quote:  “There will probably be ambient noise of murders that are happening around me.” After having missed a week of the very-nearly-weekly podcast, I decided to put one together in the car as I drove through West Hollywood. The question presented itself spontaneously. As did my apparent (mild) mental breakdown. Enjoy, internet!  

This week’s question: How do you want to be remembered? This week’s quote:  “Not by my browser history.” My buddy Jess and I talk life legacy, questionable internet habits, certifiably crazy grandmas, and much more!