Dialogue On Divorce

It’s easy to blame your exes for failed relationships. And believe that if you could just FIND the right partner, then you’d have lasting love. But what if you need to BE the right partner in order to build a great relationship? Roy Biancalana is a certified relationship coach and a nationally recognized expert in the field of attraction and conscious relationships. For the last 15 years, Roy has supported single people in the art of attracting healthy, sustainable intimate relationships. Roy also serves as host of The Attracting Lasting Love Podcast and bestselling author of several books, including Relationship Bootcamp: Hard-Core Training for Life, Love and the Pursuit of Intimacy. On this episode of Divorce Dialogues, Roy joins Katherine to explore how his own positive experience with a relationship coach inspired his career in the field and explain why we have to let go of blame to break the cycle of breakups. Roy discusses the concept of relationship personas, describing how each persona attrac

Assisted reproductive technology has dramatically changed the concept of family. And it wasn’t until the Child-Parent Security Act (CPSA) went into effect that the law in New York finally caught up with how children are being conceived. But what happens if the parents of a child conceived with assisted reproduction get divorced? Denise Seidelman is Cofounder of Rumbold and Seidelman, a firm specializing in adoption and reproductive law. She served on the Board of Trustees for the Academy of Adoption and Assisted Reproduction Attorneys and was one of three attorneys who drafted the CPSA. On this episode of Divorce Dialogues, Denise joins Katherine to share the definition of assisted reproduction and explain how it works biologically and legally. She describes how the Child-Parent Security Act revised parentage law, creating security for intended parents using assisted reproduction and making compensated surrogacy legal in New York. Listen in for insight into how assisted reproduction impacts marriages

Divorce makes most people feel isolated and alone. But what if you had a friend going through the process at the same time? Someone to lean on for support and share your experiences? Jessica Klingbaum and T.H. Irwin went through a divorce at the same time, and that shared experience inspired the two friends to found exEXPERTS, a vetted online resource and community for women navigating divorce. Prior to cofounding exEXPERTS, Jessica spent 22 years as a network news producer, and T.H. built a career in experiential marketing and business development for the media industry. On this episode of Divorce Dialogues, Jessica and T.H. join Katherine to explain how they benefitted from getting divorced at the same time and explore how supporting each other through the process led to the creation of exEXPERTS. They discuss the similarities and differences between their divorce processes, describing how Jessica experienced a relatively short, amicable divorce while T.H. endured a long, litigious one. Listen in fo

Divorce can often be the impetus for changing the way we parent into a new child-centered approach. Dr. Julie Varner is a clinical psychologist specializing in parenting and family life, including divorce and family transitions. As a married mother of four, she brings compassion and understanding to her professional work and a passion for raising and loving the little people in our lives. Besides her clinical work, she helps families through Instagram at Divorce Doodles and her children's books that explore ways to help free kids from big life burdens so they can get back to being kids. On this episode of Divorce Dialogues, Dr. Varner joins Katherine to discuss how to relate to your children in an emotionally warm way while still offering behavioral support and guidance through positive parenting. Listen in as Dr. Varner shares why positive parenting works. She offers insight into why divorce is an optimal time to transition your parenting style to help facilitate cognitive and social competencies so you

How do you learn to share your children with someone you no longer love, trust, or get along with? And how do you handle other people's expectations of you and your situation in divorce? Michelle Dempsey-Multack is a genuine girl power enthusiast. She's also a divorced, remarried mom & stepmom who is co-parenting with her daughter's father. The host of the popular Mom's Moving On podcast, Michelle, recently published her book of the same name with Simon and Schuster. Mom's Moving On is filled with empowering advice from someone who has been through it and has come out the other side. On this episode of Divorce Dialogues, Michelle joins Katherine to discuss the biggest obstacles she faced in her own divorce and how that experience led her to start her podcast and write her book to help others facing the same challenges find answers from the experts. Michelle says, "Put your children at the center of your decision-making, not in the middle. And I think there's a fine line between at the center and in t

Divorce is never easy, and when there is a child with special needs involved, it can be even more challenging. Families need support and information to navigate the complexities of special needs divorces to reach the best possible outcome with as little time, money, and stress invested as possible. Marianne Hughes is the proud mother of two sons on the opposite ends of the autism spectrum. After her divorce journey, where she successfully advocated for her children's needs, Marianne started Special Family Transitions to support families with children with disabilities as a valued Special Needs divorce coach and consultant. On this episode of Divorce Dialogues, Mary Ann joins Katherine to discuss the special considerations for co-parenting, long-term care, and child support arrangements that do not affect the special needs child's eligibility for public benefits. Listen in as Mary Ann shares how she supported her children through the social stories she created for them during her divorce and what she th

We've all heard of prenuptial agreements, those agreements signed by the marrying parties before the wedding. But what about postnuptial agreements? They may be rare, but they can be just as valuable. Many people don't understand that marriage is a legally binding contractual obligation. There are built-in legal requirements for support and property division within this contract, based on your state's law. You are entering into a legal agreement just by getting married why not go further and decide how you want your assets divided, instead of leaving it up to the state. Melinda M. Previtera is a graduate of Rutgers Law school and was named to the Top 40 Under 40 list by the Institute of Family Lawyers. She holds a certification in mediation and practices in all areas of family law as a Partner at Petrelli Previtera, LLC in Philadelphia. On this episode of Divorce Dialogues, Melinda joins Katherine to explain what postnuptial agreements are and how couples can use them to help communicate their wants

“In this world, nothing is certain except death and taxes.”—Benjamin Franklin When you are getting divorced your taxes are probably not the first thing on your mind, but as Benjamin Franklin said in his famous quote taxes remain even when a marriage ends. Taxes are never an easy topic to discuss but there are many tax implications divorcing couples should address, especially if children or alimony are involved. Tatiana Tsoir is an author, speaker, and visionary accountant. For over 15 years she's worked with business owners to help them manage their money and their bottom line. Tatiana is also an experienced adviser on all the scenarios impacting the tax-related matters of divorce. On this episode of the podcast, Tatiana joins Katherine to discuss when to bring up the issue of taxes in your divorce. She discusses the common misunderstanding about the child tax credit, the 529 plan, and strategies for both that can save both parties money. Listen in for Tatiana's insight into underutilized tax strategies

Divorce is a very complicated and emotional process on its own. It becomes even harder when we start separating the money. Dividing marital funds during a divorce may seem daunting, but there are plenty of things you can learn to make the process as smooth as possible. Shara Goldfarb is a family law attorney with the Miller Law Group and a certified divorce financial analyst. On this episode of Divorce Dialogues, Shara joins Katherine to discuss financial considerations that are important to make before starting the divorce process. She explains marital property versus separate property and what funds can be subjected to equitable division. Listen in as Shara advises on how to be reasonable with your financial expectations going into a divorce, how to gather the proper financial information needed for a divorce, and why you should try to conserve your financial resources during divorce proceedings. Topics Covered Why it’s important to gather financial information prior to divorce proceedings and what

Has your divorce left you exhausted and longing to get away from it all? When a marriage ends, most people are physically and emotionally drained. After all the chaos, a week zoning out on a beach in the sun somewhere sounds just about perfect. But what if you could combine a relaxing retreat with intentional practices designed to help you process your feelings? After her divorce, Annie Allen shifted from her former training as a Certified Marriage and Family Counselor to Certified Divorce & Life Transition Coaching®. Now she helps people through private and group coaching, her Starting Over Stronger Divorce Survival & Recovery podcast, and specialized post-divorce healing retreats. On this episode of the podcast, Annie joins Katherine to share how post-divorce healing retreats offer structured activities, designed to help participants find closure so healing can begin. Topics Covered What is a post-divorce healing retreat Why do people need to heal post-divorce The secret insight that leads to thera

What can the 12 Step Divorce Recovery Program teach you, and who benefits the most? No matter if the decision to divorce was yours or not, when a marriage ends, everyone involved suffers. With emotions at their peak, it is easy to be hijacked by the conflict trap and lose focus on what is important. But there is another way. Karen McMahon is a Certified Relationship and Divorce Coach and Founder of Journey Beyond Divorce . Karen leads a team of divorce coaches in supporting men and women around the world to become calm, clear, and confident as they navigate divorce. Karen is the co-author of Stepping out of Chaos: Turning Pain to Possibility and co-creator of JBD’s exclusive 12 Step Divorce Recovery Program. On this episode of the podcast, Karen joins Katherine to share the key components of the 12 Step Divorce Recovery Program. She walks us through a few of the steps, describing in detail the emotional healing available to program participants. Listen in for Karen's insight into how the 12 Step Divorce

Divorce is hard. The emotions of the breakup colliding with the legal business is a lot for people to manage mentally. What’s really complicated is when people get too wrapped up in their divorce and fail to see their children’s pain. But what is the best way to talk to children about divorce? What do they struggle with the most throughout the separation process? Ann Papayoti is an international life, leadership and relationship coach, as well as a speaker, educator, and co-author of The Gift of Shift, an intimate self-help book about creating a new outlook on life. She is the founder of SkyView Coaching, where she helps people rise above their most challenging moments so they can thrive once again. On this episode of Divorce Dialogues, Ann joins Katherine to explain the four main things children really want from their parents after a divorce. They discuss the complicated emotions children feel and how parents can make it as easy as possible for their kids to navigate a divorce. Listen in as Ann shares he

Why is it that some friendships don’t survive divorce? When a marriage ends, some friends feel like they have to take sides. Others are overwhelmed and simply don’t know what to say. But if you’re willing to move through a little awkwardness, you can keep the friendships that matter to you after a divorce. Terry Gaspard, MSW, LICSW, is a licensed therapist with an expertise in supporting children, adults, couples and families through divorce recovery. She is also the founder of Moving Past Divorce and author of The Remarriage Manual: How to Make Everything Work Better the Second Time Around, the 2020 winner of the American Book Fest’s Best Book Award for Self-Help: Relationships. On this episode of the podcast, Terry joins Katherine to share the four key reasons why some friendships don’t survive a divorce. She discusses the common misunderstanding that life is ruined by divorce, describing what it looks like to reclaim aspects of yourself that you abandoned in an unhappy marriage. Listen in for Terry's

Divorce can be extremely depleting and a time where most people find their self esteem to be at its lowest. Though, it can also be an opportunity to become the best version of ourselves. So, how can we get back to feeling good for ourselves after a divorce? Carol Davidson is a seasoned and certified image consultant, life coach, speaker, and educator who has helped thousands of people over the last 20 years to transform their appearance, wardrobe and self-esteem. She consults with private and corporate clients worldwide, offering a full suite of image consulting, personal styling, and life coaching services. On this episode of Divorce Dialogues, Carol joins Katherine to share her tips and tools to not only become comfortable and confident in your own skin. She explains what image consulting is and how clothing has the power to impact how you feel about yourself, affecting your moods, confidence and performance. Listen in for Carole’s insight on how to look and feel your best inside and out, even after a di

You can be in a relationship without settling for a boring life and sacrificing your desire for stability and depth of connection. Instead, there are ways to bring a creative approach to your relationship and life as a whole, resulting in years of love and happiness. Dr. Joli Hamilton is a relationship coach, research psychologist, TEDx speaker, and AASECT certified sex educator who coaches people and couples who color outside the lines, helping them create partnerships that are custom-built for their authentic selves. Joli is also the author of the best-selling book Project Relationship: The Entrepreneur's Action Plan for Passionate, Sustainable Love. On this episode of Divorce Dialogues, Dr. Joli joins Katherine to share how to create a creatively monogamous or consensually non-monogamous life. She explains how to keep a healthy and trustworthy relationship and why a non-monogamous relationship can be a helpful option for people. Listen in for Dr. Joli’s insight on creating an enjoyable and sustainable

Everyone has a different experience with divorce and different ways of working through the process. But we can learn from each other’s experiences and lean on seasoned divorce professionals to survive the process and even thrive in the aftermath of divorce. An accomplished journalist with a 25-year career covering news and entertainment, Ilyssa Panitz combined her personal and professional experience to become the only divorce columnist solely committed to helping others navigate this major life transition. She writes a daily column on all things divorce for Authority Magazine on Medium and serves as Host and Executive Producer of The Divorce Hour with Ilyssa Panitz. On this episode of Divorce Dialogues, Ilyssa joins Katherine to share her list of 5 things you need to know to survive and thrive—during and after divorce. She explains why your anger works against you in divorce negotiations and what to do about it, challenging us NOT to get hung up on the minutiae of who gets what. Listen in for Ilyssa’s insi

Self-criticism is a natural response to divorce. But it’s not particularly helpful. In fact, it’s harder to learn from a place of shame and judgement, whereas self-compassion helps us cope more effectively and make better choices moving forward. A pioneer in the field of self-compassion research, Dr. Kristin Neff currently serves as Associate Professor of Educational Psychology at the University of Texas at Austin. She is the author of the bestselling book Self-Compassion: The Proven Power of Being Kind to Yourself and coauthor of The Mindful Self-Compassion Workbook: A Proven Way to Accept Yourself, Build Inner Strength and Thrive. Dr. Neff’s new release is Fierce Self-Compassion: How Women Can Harness Kindness to Speak Up, Claim Their Power and Thrive. On this episode of Divorce Dialogues, Dr. Neff joins Katherine to explain how self-compassion helps us navigate painful experiences like divorce. She walks us through the three components of self-compassion, describing how the practice allows us to cope wi

The holidays are a particularly challenging time for divorced parents. How do we navigate our own feelings of loss without passing that heartache onto our children? Can we create new traditions and still make the holidays a magical time for our kids? Dr. Kathryn Smerling is an educator and psychologist with a PhD from Fordham University and master's from Cornell. She started her career as an early childhood educator, creating the Instep curriculum for preschoolers in the State of New Mexico before completing the psychoanalytic program at the National Institute for Psychotherapies. Dr. Smerling has maintained a private practice as a family therapist in Manhattan since 1998, and she holds certificates in Divorce Mediation, Divorce Collaboration and Relational Therapy. On this episode of Divorce Dialogues, Dr. Smerling joins Katherine to explain what divorced parents can do to navigate feelings of loss during the holidays and find new ways to celebrate with our children. She discusses why it’s crucial for co

Are you dreaming of having your day in divorce court? Of exposing your spouse’s misbehavior to a sympathetic judge? Of winning the case and being rewarded financially? Then you are going to be sorely disappointed. The truth is, the court system cares little about your spouse’s wrongdoing. And the cost of litigation (in terms of money and mental health) far outweighs any potential reward. So, what do you need to consider before you file for divorce? Rayford Dalton Palmer, JD, AAML, serves as Managing Shareholder at STG Divorce Law, a top family law firm based in the Chicagoland area. Raiford’s team has expertise in complex divorce cases, specifically those involving business owners and high-net-worth individuals. Raiford is also the author of the bestseller I Just Want This Done: How Smart, Successful People Get Divorced Without Losing Their Kids, Money and Minds. On this episode of Divorce Dialogues, Raiford joins Katherine to explore the common myth that court is the best way to resolve a divorce and ex

Technology makes it easy for divorcing couples to express their anger and frustration without thinking. They engage in text warfare and even post disparaging comments on social media. But if the goal is to divorce with dignity, the way you communicate matters. So, what can you do to be less reactive and work through the entire process in a measured way? Paulette Gloria Rigo is the founder of Better Divorce Academy, a platform dedicated to helping people create an optimal divorce experience. Paulette is also a Certified Divorce Coach, Mediator, Transition and Recovery Coach, Career Transition Specialist and author of the Amazon bestseller, Better Divorce Blueprint: Divorce Made Smoother, Easier and Better for You and Your Family. On this episode of Divorce Dialogues, Paulette joins Katherine to explore the contemplation phase leading up to a divorce and explain how to decide whether divorce is right for you. She describes what a successful divorce looks like and offers insight into the most common mistake