Titan Up The Defense

Our hosts are a bit flummoxed by this weird, cobbled together issue (which features a nine page backup story, a two page text story, and two pages of animal fun facts). We meet an evil, bullying, racist New York businessman who seems oddly familiar, discuss the viability of ruby-quartz earmuffs, and learn why you should never share silverware with an anteater.

The Titans fight off Oceanmaster and his evil alien buddies. We learn the important difference between being a bad Mofo and being an awful Mofo, our hosts wax nostalgic about an old local hair replacement commercial, and we find out that a cross between Jeff Van Gundy and Wlford Brimley is not a good look.

We got a real humdinger in this one! We see the return of an old friend (who could it be?!) and discuss Nightmare on Elm Street III: The Dream Warriors, Critters, and whether having a super punchable face counts as a superpower (I'm looking your way Ted Cruz).

We sure hope you find this issue as space as we do, but there's a fair chance that parts of it may be terry as hell. The story in this issue is a little thin, but our hosts are a bit tipsier than usual, so it all evens out. High points include giant cosmic flag burning energy bears, Cory's crash course on the Bill of Rights, and some metaphors pertaining to the edibility of metallic pies. Pretty space.

Our hosts are a bit goofier than normal in this episode. The Titans get a new member, who has got to do his own thing. We talk about Apollo Creed, Pollards (Michael and Richard), and robot gender politics.

The Titans go through some pretty heavy shit in this issue; death, alienation, a significant roster change. So naturally our hosts discuss an episode of 'Punky Brewster' Hub thinks he might have seen. Apologies to Psych majors (you'll know why when you get there).

Cory's back! The Titans hit the slopes in "Ski's of Death!" Haney's portrayal of Native Americans makes our hosts "Heap big" uncomfortable, Hub goes on an unfortunate rant against snowboarding, and we learn about the reading habits of bears.

Cory is off in Atlantis babysitting for Aquababy, so Hub is joined by Nicholas Prom from the Comic Reflections podcast. They discuss Brave and The Bold #83. Talking points include: don't name your company Zenith if you aren't evil, Worlds Greatest Detective may have been an ironic nickname, "Professor" is a pretty decent first name, and the secret to enjoying the Masters of the Universe movie. Also Hub makes what is, objectively, the greatest pun ever. Enjoy! Enjoy!

Bob Haney is back! Hooray! Robin tries to solve every problem with trapeezing, Wonder Girl dresses up like a giant chicken, and we learn that Cory won a blowgun competition in the Amazon. Seriously. Hub recommends engaging in some Richard Kimble cosplay. Y'know, for Star Wars.

The Titans get up to some more almost entirely non-sensical extra-dimensional shenanigans, we find out Wonder Girl's origin, and Cory and Hub reveal that they both watched Videodrome when they were much too young (which is to say, ever). Also, find out what Aqualad is probably up to!

You know what's a great idea? Giving blood and then having some bourbon. What else is a great idea? A costumed superhero who is a pacifist. Hawk and Dove show up in this issue. Dove sounds like Zoidberg and I get to say robo-spidertrain a bunch of times, because it's that kind of issue. We introduce a new segment called "What's Aqualad Probably Up To?".

Kind of a weird episode in which we talk about the controversial Teen Titans #20. We end up talking more about the issue it almost was more than the actual issue. Confused? Us too. Also, I decide that during his hiatus from the team Aqualad gets a pelican sidekick named Beaky. Oh, and that Robin is actually Tom Cruise. He really is.

In which the Titans run afoul of a precocious puppet fetishist. Hub is recovering from pneumonia and has decided to use that as an excuse for not making a ton of sense. Wuss. Points of discussion: rural nightclubs, comedia dell'arte, Lanny Poffo, and four geese standing on each other's shoulders wearing a trench coat. Chalk that one up to the pneumonia.

Kind of a lame issue, so we talk about Skateman, the benefits and drawbacks of having a pelican sidekick, the Swedish Chef and his short-lived "Kroonchy Stars" breakfast cereal and the fact that werewolves may have had purple urine. Y'know, typical Teen Titans stuff.

The Mad Mod Returns! The gang heads to England, Cory doesn't understand how notes work, Aqualad and the Loch Ness Monster have a special relationship, and we discuss the plot to Halloween III: Season of the Witch. Oh, and Robin pretty much sits out this adventure. Hooray!

We're all loopy on tryptophan and Bob Haney's writing, so this one is a little hard to follow. We spend way too much time talking about the movie 'Torque' and the Hardy Boys books, and I think there's a Teen Titans story about extra-dimensional travel in there somewhere. But seriously, check out 'Torque'. It's a goddamn delight!

My favorite era of Teen Titans comics is underway! The gang heads to Hippieville USA and goes undercover as a bunch of counterculture types, which seems like it would have been the perfect opportunity to bring up the fact that Cory used to have dreadlocks, but somehow I forgot. Dang it!

Everybody hates Robin. The Boy Wonder runs afoul of the Gargoyle and pretty much everyone else as the Titans see the return of an old foe…sort of. Join us as we learn the benefits of narcissism, sociopathy, and having a magic ring shaped like your own head.

It's a Christmas/Halloween Spooktacular! The Titans give us their take on 'A Christmas Carol', so naturally we talk about Cory's ongoing battle with the animal kingdom and Hub's misremembered Wyclef Jean lyrics.

We join the Titans as they travel into the deep dark void of…South Dakota! Oh, and also space. It's one of the Titans' least coherent and most fun issues yet. Enjoy! Enjoy!