I Feel Snitty with Craig Rozniecki

"Mikey's On Crack" (to the tune of Sir Mix-A-Lot's "Baby Got Back") OMG, Karen, look at his eyes They are like so dilated The pupils are like so round They’re like those big, bouncy things - basketballs I can’t look at him, ‘cause I’m scared Like more scared than I was when I watched “Gremlins” I mean, his eye things are so big And not to be racist, but they’re like really black too Like thick mol(e)-asses He’s just so whacked   He smokes the rock and he always lies His pillow, he hides it inside When he goes to bed at night, he pulls it out and then Tries to light up, but misses His wig now on fire, he freaks out ‘Cause he thinks a rat’s in the house He tells it to go away ‘Stead of pouring water its way He starts throwing his pillows at it And then screams, “Oh, sh*t!” Thought rocks were still in the case Even though they were in front of his face So, what’s he do now? Call Blue Lives Matter peeps for aid? Naw He goes and lights up Using his rat-hairpiece for help It’s all good a