Funny Messy Life

 You know what's funny? Watching somebody try to drink right after a trip to the dentist's office while their mouth is still numb and everything spills down the front of their shirt like a tiny baby. You know what's NOT funny? After the numbing stuff wears off and every single nerve ending is zapping you face with electric hell. I've had some conditions I've had to heal from that have been quite embarrassing, gross, or both, and I wouldn't normally even consider mentioning them, but hey – we throw ourselves out there for the sake of comedy, right?  ________________  A Tooth Extraction Is A Major Head Wound  The following was written in a pain-induced state on a hot and humid night in July of 2015.  And NO, I DO NOT WHINE!  It’s a hot and humid night in July of 2015.  I hesitate to write about the poor condition of my teeth because I’m from the south and there is a long observed stereotype about southerners and their dental habits, or lack thereof, and I don't enjoy the idea of progressing it. However, I'm mov