Divorce Talk With Nicola Beer

Are you sick and tired of your spouse’s behaviour you have no more to give? Are you at the end of your tether? Do you think an ultimatum is your only way out? We hear people giving ultimatums every day. “If you don’t stop doing X then Y will be the consequence.” However, more often than not these ultimatums are being issued by a parent to a child. This is a relationship where power and responsibility lie with the parent. It is the parent’s job to ensure that a child grows up knowing what is right and wrong, setting boundaries to ensure safety. The reasons for adults giving ultimatums within a marriage can be a reaction to many types of behaviours. Examples such as your partner having an affair, addiction to food, spending, pornography, alcoholism, drug abuse and obsessiveness about any other aspect of their life. These behaviours will have left you feeling hurt and resentful. It is understandable why you would feel that giving an ultimatum would be your only option. However it can often make things work in th