Zoe Nightingale

  • Autor: Vários
  • Narrador: Vários
  • Editora: Podcast
  • Duração: 84:59:26
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Informações:

Sinopse

You're Welcome is a satirical improv comedy show whose goal is to find and share peoples stories, from all over the world. Each episode is unique and can range from 5 minutes to an hour, and will feature a brand new topic usually with someone Zoe has just met. This podcast is not for the faint of heart, buckle up. ABOUT YOU'RE WELCOMELike most brilliant ideas, this show was started over a molotov concoction of alcohol and various illicit substances. Zoe had given up on her life long dream, of being the female Howard Stern years ago but finally set out armed with a folding table, a couple lawn chairs, and a foam board sign that read "Free Sex Advice." One by one strangers stopped what they were doing and sat down to talk to them about their lives. We'd like to take this moment to thank you for coming to our site and leave you with the eternal words of Oscar Wilde:"I was under the impression that inordinate joviality can atone for an entire lack of class" ABOUT ZOEWhen Zoe's Pre K teacher told her parents that she had best negative leadership qualities she had ever seen in 20 years of teaching," her family knew they were in trouble. After professionally taking up space all over the world for years, traveling extensively throughout South America and Europe, Zoe went to school in Charleston South Carolina, where she stuck bumper stickers like "Bush Lies" "Keep You Laws Off My Body" "It's a Choice Not a Child," on the back of her car and was then shocked when 8 tired super charged red necks hopped up on Mountain Dew would try to kill her. Since she was the sole representative for Yankees and Jews, she probably set both causes back a century. In college she lived with three wonderful European men who introduced her to the electronic music scene. The love of this music caused her to have brief yet passionate love affairs with Paris and Berlin, finally deciding to settle down and marry New York City. For the last 29 years hurricane Zoe has swept through countless countries leaving a cornucopia of chaos and laughter in her wake.

Episódios

  • Episode 19: I Treat My Dog Much Better Than Your Wife Treats You

    18/02/2014 Duração: 06min

    Introducing Bogey, the champion Samoyed. We interviewed his owner about the effects showing champion dogs can take on your sex life. Bogey was being groomed, petted and attended to by 3 asians who were literally imported from all over the world to tend to this fantastic specimen. His owner looked like he had come straight from Goldman Sachs and had the deep red lobster glow of a man whose just gotten back from Ft Lauderdale and had been wearing a flowered shirt and a jimmy buffett hat. Shockingly, his owner seemed totally willing to sell me his prized animal for the right price even when I asserted it would be to sell off as meat to koreans or for my own personal pleasure. Anyway, the dog was INCREDIBLE. Like a giant Falcor marshmallow lion teddy bear made of clouds. My apologies there is a sound of the dryer of them puffing up this fluff ball while i spoke to him, it's a tad annoying.

  • Episode 18: Get Down on Your Knees and Take One for the Team

    18/02/2014 Duração: 12min

    You're Welcome was invited to cover the 2014 Westminster Kennel Club Dog Show. I met the most wonderful people and learned about the complicated politics behind this event. My absolute favorite was this sparkling disco ball, Darla Sue Doherty handler of Castle, a Great Pyrenees and the runner up at the Westminster Dog Show 2014. Hailing from the snowy tundras of Indiana, this woman was straight out of Best in Show and literally had a busy bee.

  • Episode 17: Hookers For Jesus

    07/02/2014 Duração: 18min

    When I saw the Hookers for Jesus booth I immediately thought it was going to be some sort of obnoxious conversion freaks however these were incredibly eloquent wonderful women who turned difficulties in their life into an opportunity to help others. Yes there is an undercurrent of religion to their work, but they are helping women who have been sex trafficked or fallen through the cracks of the sex industry get a second chance at life. Through cocaine addiction, domestic violence, and cancer Annie has made it out of a devastating life as a prostitute and turned her life around now helping her fellow sex workers find a way out of a vicious cycle of drugs, death and disease. She worked under the name "Falon" for 16 years until she eventually overdosed on cocaine after being diagnosed with Lymphoma. After I talked to her two coworkers, women who had been married for 30 years to porn addicts who came to work for Hookers For Jesus after their painful divorces. They talked a lot about the devastatingly effects porn

  • Epidsode 16: It Must Be Your Fathers DNA

    03/02/2014 Duração: 05min

    One of the best parts of starting this show was my mothers reaction to it. I can't begin to tell you how much fun it is to watch her respond to the different topics I bring up and her shock and confusion over the nefarious people I meet. Basically my mother has this sweet, insanely gullible head in the clouds mindset (She thought my bong was a water vase) and regardless of how many times I trick her, she always has faith that in the future I will "act with gentle loving kindness." It reminds me of the Einstein quote about the definition of insantity... It's not her fault, her name is Kathy Jane and she grew up in the 50's and wore white gloves and pearls at dinner. Her clothes had her name embroidered in them and the most trouble she ever got in was when she definantly refused to eat her Strawberry Rhubarb Pie and was sent to her room without desert. However, she's always had a problem with what she calls my "fresh" mouth, and while she's come to terms with who I am, I still have so much fun pushing her butto

  • Episode 15: Moby Dick is the Only Dick Jesse Jane Hasn't Seen

    02/02/2014 Duração: 10min

    I learned so much from Miss Jesse Jane, Queen of Porn. First lesson, you can be a serious professional and not even know what LinkedIn is!! Second, how to give the perfect blow job. Third, not everyone paid attention is English Lit Class like I did. Surprisingly, my Melville reference was completely lost on this blonde bombshell. Jesse has appeared in several mainstream films and TV shows including Entourage, and starred in more than 75 adult including the most expensive Porn to have ever been made. "Pirates". (A spoof on Pirates of the Carribean!) She has an incredible array of sex toys, lubes, Fleshlights and real dolls, basically she is a super Baller with a net worth of 8 million all earned with carefully placed blow jobs, she is my HERO. She has an important lesson, love yourself and your body no matter what color or shape it comes in, lucky for her however, her's comes in the shape of sex on a stick. She's literally like a pedofiles wet dream. Introducing, the one, the only Jesse Jane.

  • Episode 14: You Can't Jew a Jew

    31/01/2014 Duração: 06min

    Brian Pumper and His Little Love Muscle How do I even begin. I saw this teeny tiny black man dripping in diamond jewelry leading a giant black woman dressed in white lace lingerie (who had a foopah so large that it could have doubled as a waterbed) ON A WHITE LEASH. It was so wonderful that I ran through the casino to ask him for an interview. Let me be clear, Brian or "B" Pumper is eloquent, educated, and hilarious, and has an AMAZING list of Porn Titles under his belt. Some of my favorite are: 1. Weapons of Ass Destruction 2., Black Poles cumin up white holes 3. 1 in the pink 2 in the Stink, (which is wonderful change up of the usual saying) 4. Butts Tits Feet Mouth Dick Pussy 2, 5.Can a Brotha Get a Squirt 1, 6. Bootylicious 44: Slaves For The Black Man, 7. Black Thai Affair 8. Black on White Crime 4 9. Black in My Saddle Again 10.Beverly Hills 9021-ho 3 11. Racial Profiling 2 12.Big Black Sticks In Little White Slits 13. Where the Fuck's the G Spot? The poetry, the word play the metaphor the use of hundre

  • Episode 13: Frankly My Dear, I Have Erectile Dysfunction

    29/01/2014 Duração: 07min

    Oh how I loved this lovely old man...(he was born in 1938!) I found him strolling around the convention hall, his leather sholder bag stuffed full of films titled things like Mothers Vs. Daughters...He had recently lost his life long wife and was spending his days volunteering at the Zoo (i mean how adorable) and jerking off to 18 year old girls who have to hold up their passport in the beginning, probably from an eastern european country just to prove they aren't 12...Anyway I digress, he was actually really sweet and dreamed of a day when he could simply have sex with a nice girl...who was three dimensional. We talked about having sex in your third trimester of life...trust me, I think all of us should forget about all our insecurities and have as much sex as humanely possible because the future is BLEAK kids

  • Episode 12: I Don't Want no Short Short Man

    27/01/2014 Duração: 03min

    I met this kevin federline (KFC version) looking man who claimed his name was Hung Low and he was from Singapore. Problem was he was wearing a collection of claire's jewelry which he called "real fake" and sounded like a cast member of jersey shore. He admitted to me with very little probing why he uses dildos...

  • Episode 10: The Wonderful Life of Evan Stone, Porn Legend

    21/01/2014 Duração: 17min

    How can I even begin to describe what an absolute legend this man is. He's dominated the Porn industry for the last 12 years, and I couldn't get enough of his style, humor, and razor sharp wit. From a small town in Texas where he worked at a slaughterhouse, to the big dick king of adult films, sit back and enjoy the ride.

  • Episode 9: I Could Get 50,000 dollars for Your Kidney.

    20/01/2014 Duração: 06min

    I met Tan, a lovely quiet Malaysian man with a wonderful laugh and fabulous bond villian accent. He had been standing in line for two hours trying to get Jesse Jane to take a picture with him (the Queen of Blowjobs and Princess of Digital Playground) and i decided to keep him company while he waited. We talked about his masturbation habits, and his inability to keep a girlfriend due to his rampant porn addiction.

  • Episode 8: The Flashman - There should be no Hair below the Eyelashes

    20/01/2014 Duração: 04min

    I met an absolutely terrifying man in my trip to Las Vegas Porn Awards this weekend. His name was "Flashman" he was holding three open Budweisers, and claimed to be on something called "Miley Cyrus Extacy" he was wearing the entire claire's collection of jewelry from 1993 and his breath smelled like china town in august. Enjoy

  • You're Welcome - Episode 7 - Diego's Story

    10/12/2013 Duração: 12min

    Introducing Diego. One of the best men I've ever met. Wonderful, charismatic, homeless man living in Thompskin Sq park since 1999. I have never wanted to help someone as badly as I did this man. He was sharp, funny and his story broke my heart. I have tried to find him, for over a year since I met him. I fell in love with his story, and I've never been able to get the sound of his voice out of my head.

  • You're Welcome - Episode 6 - You Could Eat Breakfast off that Ass

    10/12/2013 Duração: 10min

    A beautiful 25 years old mother and wife to a Marine sat down to talk to me about what was missing in her sex life, her fantasies and called her husband so we could tell him together what he could do to make her more satisfied.

  • You're Welcome - Episode 5 - Hassids...Russian Mail Order Brides and Prostitution Oh MY!

    04/12/2013 Duração: 15min

    Two drop dead gorgeous, on fire gay men stopped to talk to me about monogamy, relationships, and a secret life of prostitution.

  • Episode 3 of You're Welcome: Sex vs. Death

    22/11/2013 Duração: 13min

    Tom, a 60 year old, very handsome Vet of multiple wars came to talk to us about his 5,000 plus sexual partners, what it feels like to take a life, and the wonderful world of 1960's in Spain.

  • Episode 2 of You're Welcome: Ladies you're not in Kansas anymore.

    18/11/2013 Duração: 12min

    Two ladies,dressed in J crew turtle necks, fresh off the greyhound, came to talk to me about their troubles with online dating, their vagina size, and their love of whipped cream schnapps. I must say, they were excellent sports, I was in a feisty mood and they took it with dignity grace and a lot of laughter.

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