Horizontal With Lila

SUBSCRIBE to the new "POSITIVELY SEX! WITH LILA" podcast on APPLE PODCASTS (or wherever you like to get your podcasts) & never miss an episode!    Get ready for a 46 episode season of Sex Ed, with Pleasure! Host Lila, Intimacy Specialist & founding member of the premier sex-positive intentional community in New York, explores intimacy of all kinds in this sex-positive talk show on timely, titillating, tender, & taboo topics. Her guests are pro-Dommes, therapists, kink masters, sex coaches, non-monogamous people, & folx on the street with opinions. Positively Sex! celebrates intimacy & our ability to design our own relationships. PS! talks about all those sex things you want to know, but might be hesitant to ask. PS! lays it all out for you. PS! is sex ed, with pleasure. Darling, that is Positively Sex!

Hello horizontal lover. This is horizontal with lila, the podcast about intimacy of all kinds, recorded while lying down. Usually, the first part of our conversation is available wherever you listen to podcasts, and the last part is available exclusively to my patrons on Patreon.com/horizontalwithlila. Navigate yourself on over to Patreon for 50+ exclusive horizontal episodes! Season 4, however, is my Season of Experiments. The experiment of this episode... introduces you to my brand-new live show, Positively Sex! Sex Ed, with Pleasure. Clubhouse pioneered a new form of media: interactive social audio. It’s like a podcast you can participate in...  I joined the app in late February and promptly became deeply infatuated. Really. Full-on limerence. NRE: New Relationship Energy. I hardly slept! I barely ate! I talked about it to anyone who would listen! I fell asleep at wee morning hours in Clubhouse rooms, the phone half under the pillow next to me. It was, if you will, horizontal with clubhouse. It began by ‘r

Hello horizontal lover. Intimacy investigator. Horizontalist. Typically, horizontal is the podcast about intimacy of all kinds, recorded while lying down. The first part of our conversation is available wherever you listen to podcasts, and the last part is available exclusively to my patrons on Patreon. But this: is Season 4, my Season of Experiments. And this experiment is an installment of Alexa Martinez’s that sex chick podcast, which was, full disclosure, recorded while in bed, but (gasp!) sitting upright. For that sex chick, it’s episode 34, and for horizontal, episode 128. I’m told it’s the longest Alexa has ever gone with a guest, so, here’s to horizontal stamina. *wink* In this episode, sex parties done right, I share the orientation I lead at my last play party — which is a Facebook-safe euphemism for a sex party — in its entirety. Alexa’s super-connected sex-positive crew of curious kittens, a collective on Facebook called That Sex Group, have been really curious about these parties. Both of us hav

Hello my horizontal lovers, my intimacy investigators, my horizontalists! horizontal is the podcast about intimacy of all kinds, recorded while lying down (and usually, while wearing robes).  With few exceptions, our conversations are languorous, meandering, and long-form, as though post-coital, or stargazing, or staring out onto the open road in the wee hours of a very long road trip. It’s a private conversation made public. It’s consensual eavesdropping. Typically on horizontal, each conversation is between 3 and 5 hours long, and divided into two to four parts. The former half is available to all horizontalists, and the latter, is available exclusively to patrons of the horizontal arts.  This is Season 4, my Season of Experiments. During this season, I’m investigating form and format, length and structure, context and content. Playing aurally. Trying things I haven’t tried yet. Thus far, Season 4 has seen a mash-up with Devin Person’s “this podcast is a ritual” show, episodes with more-or-less intrusive na

Hello my horizontal lovers, my intimacy investigators, my horizontalists! horizontal is the podcast about sex, love, & relationships of all kinds, recorded while lying down, and usually, while wearing robes. If you’ve listened to either one of my ‘between two wizard’ episodes, 85. well-hung psychedelic sex wizard / no hookups or 86. you’re trying to porn sex me, or my most magical recent horizontal mashup episodes, 123. this ritual is horizontal, or 124. this horizontal is a ritual, you’ve become acquainted with my Wizard friend, Devin Person. During both of our horizontal recordings (one in-person, in his former wizard bed in Greenpoint, Brooklyn, and the other virtual, mediated by the magic of the interwebz, between Louisville, Kentucky, and Canggu, Bali, Indonesia) a remarkable fact about his relationship surfaced: he and his partner (now fiancé) don’t text. Ever. It’s one of their cherished relationship agreements, a social norm within the co-creation of their dyad. They just don’t text. If they wan

Hello horizontal lovers & ritualists, horizontal is the podcast about sex, love, & relationships of all kinds, recorded while lying down. this ritual is horizontal is part of my Season 4, the Season of Experiments.  Usually, I have a guest or two reclining next to me, sharing a pillow, but This Season in the Era of Covid, my guest is often lying down across the world from me, as Devin is here... and we have an intimate, vulnerable, long-ranging and long-form conversation that unfolds over the course of  3 - 5 hours, and gets divided into 2 - 4 episodes. Typically, the first half of our conversation is available in all the podcast places, and the latter half is available exclusively to patrons of the horizontal arts. In the latter part of our conversation, which will be episode 124 on horizontal, we discuss a bit of ghosting wizardry, dating reviews, self-holds, and parenting our inner child. Then I tell Devin a story about being photographed nude in a nest, and the most miserable sexy dance party, and

Hello horizontal lover.  This is the podcast about sex, love, & relationships of all kinds that’s entirely recorded while lying down. Usually, I aim to make every recording more of a long-form conversation and less of an interview, but the world is topsy-turvy, and so is Season 4, my Season of Experiments. This episode is a traditional interview (albeit, an explicit one) mostly presented in the style of NPR. Instead of my usual horizontal conversation, in which I share as openly and vulnerably as my guest, for this episode I’ll be your narrator, guiding you through the life of an oversexed little Italian boy who grows up to be an oversexed British man, utilizing choice clips from his tales. In this and the following episode, I lie down with Iena: vast lover of womankind, kinkster, rope aficionado, photographer, former porn producer, and sadist extraordinaire. I met him through the Shibari community in Canggu. He once suspended me from a piece of bamboo in a pose that looked kind of like a praying mantis.

Hello horizontal lover. horizontal is the podcast about sex, love, & relationships of all kinds, entirely recorded while lying down. Usually, I have a guest or sometimes two (and on one notable occasion, nine!) reclining next to me, or, This Season in the Era of Covid, my guest is sometimes lying down across the world from me ... and we have an intimate, vulnerable, long-form and far-ranging conversation that unfolds over the course of  3 - 5 hours, and gets divided into 2 - 4 episodes. horizontal is Slow Radio. A kind of stargazing, or post-coital, or loooong road trip sort of conversation. And that’s what horizontality is to me. A relinquishing of pretense. A deepening of voice. A languor that inspires revelation. An invitation to unzip to our tenderest. It’s like consensual eavesdropping. We invite you in to lie down next to us, as we share our secrets in your ears. Typically, the first half of our conversation is available in all the podcast places for all of you horizontalists, and the latter half is

Hello horizontal lover. horizontal is the podcast about intimacy of all kinds, recorded while lying down. You’re listening to Season 4, my Season of Experiments. During this season, I’m playing with form and format, length and structure, context and content. I’ll be including mash-ups with other podcasts, themed episodes, crossovers, and shows with segments, among other things. Unlike the first three seasons, most of Season 4 will be recorded remotely, so I’m often horizontal across the world from my guest … which is a grand experiment in itself. This is part three of my 4-episode arc with Kelsey Grant: Love Educator, boundaries expert, writer, singer, witchy woman, & creatrix of various kinds… known on Instagram as @radicalselflove. Usually, my horizontal recording sessions are between 3 and 5 hours long, and divided into two parts (if 3 hours) or 4 parts (if 5). The first installment — or the first two installments — are available in all the podcast places for all horizontalists, and the second half — o

Hello, horizontal lover. horizontal is the podcast about sex, love, and relationships of all kinds, recorded while lying down. This is Season 4, my Season of Experiments. This season marks the first time I’ve ever recorded remotely. So, many times, I’m no longer in the same bed as my guest— which is already a grand experiment in itself, as every single episode of my first three seasons was recorded in person, lying down, wearing robes, shoulder-to-shoulder, right next to my guest. As though stargazing, or post-coital, or in the deep hours of a very long road trip. I’m always saying that I want to expand people’s notion of what intimacy is, and can be. Remaining overseas during a global pandemic has encouraged me to expand my own notion of intimacy. I used to disparage the value of virtual connection... and suddenly, that’s most of what most of us have. And we must figure out how to make it nourishing for us… or go hungry. My mission holds steady: To make the world a more intimate place. One episode, one conve

Hello my horizontal lover. horizontal is the podcast about sex, love, and relationships of all kinds, recorded while lying down. This is Season 4, my Season of Experiments. I’ll be playing with form in all sorts of ways: with coaching sessions and mash-ups and crossovers, happenings and themes and advice sessions, horizontality in unexpected places, and other intimate surprises. In the first four episodes of this season, I (virtually) lie down with Lemarc Thomas, global matchmaker, relationship expert, sweetheart, psychology-versed purveyor of kindness, native St. Helenian, marriage equality advocate, husband to Michael, and, as he has been dubbed by The Telegraph, “the gentle but determined Cupid.” Our first two episodes are available in all the podcast places for all my horizontalists. Parts three and four will be available exclusively to patrons of the horizontal arts. Become a patron for access to The Full Horizontal by navigating directly to patreon.com/horizontalwithlila ! In our first part, episode 11

Hello my horizontal lover. horizontal is the podcast about sex, love, and relationships of all kinds, recorded while lying down. This is the kickoff of Season 4, my Season of Experiments. I’ll be playing with form in all sorts of ways: with coaching sessions and mash-ups and crossovers, happenings and themes and advice sessions, horizontality in unexpected places, and other intimate surprises. In all my visions for Season 4, I never considered recording virtually as one of the experiments, let alone the central experiment. But the world changed. I never wanted to record virtually. I was, in fact, entirely adamant about recording in person, right next to my guest, sharing a pillow, shoulder-to-shoulder, wearing robes. That’s how it went. I felt the vibe depended on it. The depth. The felt intimacy translated from our proximal bodies, through the magic of the recorded sound waves, and into you. I thought the only way you would truly feel as if you were lying down next to us was if we were, in fact, literally ly

Hello horizontal lovers. horizontal is the podcast about sex, love, & relationships of all kinds that’s recorded while lying down, wearing robes.   A typical recording is long and languorous, and lasts between three and five hours. When I release it, I divide it into two parts (if we recorded for three hours) and four parts (if we recorded for five). The first half of the conversation is available in all the podcast places, and the second is available exclusively to patrons of the horizontal arts.   For access to The Full Horizontal, and to be a part of eradicating shame, diminishing loneliness, & alchemizing human connection, become a $7+ patron of the horizontal arts by navigating directly to patreon.com/horizontalwithlila   At the end of each longform conversation, I ask my guest to tell me a story, and the story marks the conclusion of our patron episode together. It can be any personal story that falls under the broad umbrella of intimacy — sex, love, or relationships of any kind. I’ve had

Hello horizontal lovers. horizontal is consensual eavesdropping on conversations about intimacy of all kinds, recorded while lying down, wearing robes. In this and the following episode, I lie down with Kai Mata, Indonesia’s rainbow-toting, openly LGBTQ+ singer-songwriter. She is a thoughtful rock star, an articulate activist, a love advocate, an outspoken woman with a bamboo guitar living a love life of liberation in a country that expects its women to be neither outspoken nor liberated. I love her. And her meter-long hair. Kai wears maroon and black almost exclusively, right down to her motorbike helmet. She displays or wears a rainbow flag at every single show, at every single gig, and she will continue to do so until all of her people are free to love who they love. She battles internet trolls, social media harassment, hate messages, homophobia, discrimination, and erasure by her culture of origin on a daily basis. She is publicly out in a country that persecutes its LGBTQ+ citizens. She is out for all of

In this episode, I lie down with myself. I share: *  the WOC Podcasters solidarity statement *  my personal commitment to ongoing anti-racist action *  the names of a few of the many Black lives lost to police brutality, and: *  the story of that time I didn't talk about race (for 11 years) and how that is a textbook example of white fragility and privilege *** I stand with my sisters from the WOC Podcasters Community, lead by Danielle Desir and crafted by change-maker Tangia Renee [TAN-gee]. These are Tangee’s words. These are our words: We are podcasters united to condemn the tragic murders of George Floyd, Breonna Taylor, and many many others at the hands of police. This is a continuation of the systemic racism pervasive in our country since its inception and we are committed to standing against racism in all its forms. We believe that to be silent is to be complicit. We believe that Black lives matter. We believe that Black lives are more important than property. We believe that we have a responsibility

Hello horizontal lovers. horizontal with lila is Slow Radio. Consensual eavesdropping. Intimate talks about intimate topics recorded while lying down right next to each other, wearing robes. This is part two of my four-episode arc with Eri Kardos Patel and Jaymin Patel, recorded in February 2020. Eri & Jay are world travelers, long-time digital nomads, co-parents of two young children, and American expats in Bali. Eri is the author of the book Relationship Agreements, Jaymin the creator of The Integrated Father. In part one, episode 104. good kids gone wild, Jay and I told our origin stories, and Eri began hers.  Jaymin’s story involved a strict Indian family, sisters and aunties aplenty, bi-cultural identity, being a model Hindu and a very very very good boy, doing right by his parents, musical theatre, people-pleaser recovery, embracing his weird, Adlerian psych, and positive discipline. Eri’s involved 3 siblings, constant uprootings, dance, 5 or 6 baptisms, being a very very very good girl, backpacking

Hello horizontal lovers. horizontal with lila is Slow Radio. Consensual eavesdropping. Intimacies of all kinds. It’s us lying down right next to each other, wearing robes, sharing secrets, in your ears. Welcome in, and welcome back! It’s been a few months since my last episode — This winter, I got mired in a boggy swamp of depression, stared at the ceiling for a while, binge-watched a lot of dystopian TV, and then journeyed to Bali, Indonesia, to get my juju back. It’s back! And... I suppose I live in Bali (for) now! I’ve missed you. I’ve missed this. It’s a whole new world out there. And yet. I am more than ever convinced that we need to make private conversations public. I am more than ever convinced that interdependence is the word of the century. I am more than ever convinced that intimacy is the way. Connection is my wheelhouse. And so, I renew my vows: to dispel shame, combat loneliness, and alchemize human connection. Most of us are treading water. We might be back with families we haven’t lived with s

Usually, our conversation is long and languorous, and lasts between three and five hours. When I release it, I divide it into two parts (if we recorded for three hours) and four parts (if we recorded for   five). The first half of the conversation is available in all the podcast places, and the second is available exclusively to patrons of the horizontal arts. You can become a patron for access to The Full Horizontal by signing up on patreon.com/horizontalwithlila At the end of each conversation, I ask my guest to tell me a story, and the story marks the conclusion of our final episode together. It can be any personal story that falls under the broad umbrella of intimacy — sex, love, or relationships of any kind. In episode 102. you can’t have dibs on a person, Dennis’s story was about how he met his biological father. In episode 97. let me show you what I can offer, Leidy’s was about the best sex of her entire life. I’ve had stories of being carried down a mountaintop, watching your wife have a miscarriage,

This is THE 100TH EPISODE OF horizontal!!! Naturally, this one is a bit different than the others. In celebration, I am releasing a never-before-heard experimental episode, recorded on May 21st, 2019 — the 2 year anniversary of horizontal.  In every other episode, I lie down with one or two people at a time. In this special, I lie down with 9! I gathered as many previous horizontal guests, patrons, and supporters as I could, and asked my boyfriend at the time to join us. We recorded at Hacienda Studio, the event space of Hacienda Villa, my intentional community. We had three beds and three microphones. None of us were sure how it would go. What would come up when the 9 of us tried to have one conversation? In this episode, I lie down with: Kristi Ann, spectacular dancer and movement artist, and my friend who, behind the scenes, has quietly helped me choose between the titles for my episodes. Mirelle, horizontal’s very first guest! Resident of the Villa, my housemate and friend, and, as you may recall, a cons

horizontal is Slow Radio about intimacies of all kinds. I think of it as consensual eavesdropping — we’re lying down, wearing robes, sharing secrets, in your ears. In this, the second episode of a four-part series with those who consider themselves chosen brother and sister, I lie down with Jillian Richardson, creator of The Joy List and author of Unlonely Planet & her housemate Dennis E. Sarkozy, Lifestyle Designer and co-lead of Personal Development Nerds. Each horizontal conversation is typically between 3 and 5 hours long. When it’s 3 hours long, it gets divided into two parts: part one is available to everyone in all the podcast places, and part two is available exclusively to my patrons. When the conversation goes for most of the night, like this one did, it gets divided into four parts: parts one and two are available to everyone, and parts three and four are available exclusively to patrons of the horizontal arts. In part one of this conversation, episode 98. withhelds & unsaids, Jillian and