Breaking Bread Podcast

Solomon the wise said, “He that is slow to anger is better than the mighty.” Those of us who have lost the battle of self-control know just how mighty “the slow to anger” are. In this episode of Breaking Bread, Brian Sutter helps us understand the emotion of anger. He explains its purpose, how it works and how to live wisely in your own experience so that you might be slow to anger.

The church is God’s family. To participate in church, is to participate in “together.” What if “together” is difficult for you? In this episode of Breaking Bread, Kristen Schwind and Ron Messner give voice to the introvert in church. They highlight both the weaknesses and the strengths our personalities pose in how we experience the “together” aspect of church.   Who is an introvert?   A person who finds solitude as life-giving and human interaction as life-expending.    Who is an extrovert?  A person who finds human interaction as life-giving and solitude as life-expending.    How can introversion in the church be challenging?    Fellowship can be difficult.  By being reserved, individuals can be misjudged as aloof or uncaring.  By being reserved, individuals can be passed over for duties.  By not being always present, individuals can be misjudged as uncommitted.   How can we walk in an understanding way towards the introvert in church?  Be a safe person to talk to.  Use their gift of listenin

The communication process is hard enough with just words. Add emotion to the mix and sometimes we might as well be speaking a foreign language. This is because the present moment meaning we attribute to emotions has been constructed in the past. In this episode of Breaking Bread, Kaleb Beyer untangles the knot spousal communication can find itself in because we are not decoding the emotions in the room correctly.   There are six basic emotions common to all people: happiness, sadness, surprise, shame, anger and fear. Each of these emotions has a lot of shades. For example, anger spans from irritation to rage with many experiences in between. The meaning we make out of emotions is not common among all people. For example, anger for one person means something different to another. The meaning we make out of emotions was constructed in past experiences. For example, how a person did or did not experience soothing when anger arose in their past largely formed up the meaning they attribute to anger today. In marr

Identify formation follows a simple path: Exploration to Commitment. Exploration must precede commitment. Commitment must precede a settled identity. Yet, taking the path is not necessarily easy. In this episode of Breaking Bread, Ted Witzig Jr. explains some of the finer points along the journey to belonging, purpose and worth.

Identity answers the question, who I am and who I am not. An answer that is multi-faceted -both objective and subjective. Sometimes obvious and other times obscure. And to make it trickier, it shifts over time. In this episode of Breaking Bread, Ted Witzig Jr helps us understand the nature of identity formation and how we can better steward this area of our life. Show notes: Identity is: The sense of self - who I am and who I am not. Aspects that make up identity: Demographics: age, sex, address Relationships: child, father, mother, husband, wife Roles: job, family, volunteer Values: likes, dislikes, religion, beliefs, loyalties Experiences: health, hobbies, accomplishments, ownership Personalities: gifts, character traits, talents Events that unsettle identity: Development Loss Transition Role shifts Experiences Belief shifts Process for forming identity: From exploration: trying, investigating, experiencing, researching To commitment: being settled, resolved and grounded Troubles in forming identity

We don’t like it when things are out of reach. Especially when they are good things. But sometimes they just are. In this episode of Breaking Bread, Brian Sutter helps us understand what health looks like amid the disappointment of our inabilities.    Definition: Limitations are those things that we cannot do or achieve regardless of effort or resources.  Potential examples: IQ, Physical limitations, Mental limitations, Human developmental stage, Economics  Reality: Limitations are often sources of pain in a person’s life. We don’t like to be told “no” you can’t do that.  Healthy Mental Processing: Limitations are losses to be grieved.  Acknowledge the limitation.  Grieve the limitation.  Listen for the lie limitation has posited in your thinking. (ex. You are stupid.)  Correct the lie with truth.   Accept the limitation.  Healthy Mindset: Do not identify yourself according to your limitation. Rather, understand your limitation to be part of your unique story and an aspect beloved by God the Father.

Many explanations for our present realities harken back to our past. After all, who of us has not been shaped by the layers of life upon life? The marriage relationship is a crucible whereby these past experiences have a very present voice. In this episode of Breaking Bread, Kaleb Beyer explains the impact past trauma plays in present marriages. Understanding this unwelcome visitor in our today marriage relationship provides a great deal of explanation for the interactions we experience between spouses. It also, unlocks a hopeful path for an increasingly healthy marriage. What is trauma? Sometimes our present experiences trigger danger, even when we are objectively safe. This may be a sign of trauma. In our past, traumatic experiences threatened our safety. Today, experiences may trigger that past offense and send negative reactions surging through our thoughts, feelings and behaviors. Trauma can affect all areas of our life including the marriage relationship. Thoughts are triggered by trauma: Trauma strikes

The Lord is my Shepherd I shall not want. This classic Bible verse from the Psalms sums up the whole of contentment. Yet, there are some well-worn pitfalls. In this episode of Breaking Bread, Tom Waldbeser and Isaac Funk address these and how they can be avoided.

Contentment is not the ability to do without. Rather, it is possessing all that matters. In this episode of Breaking Bread, Tom Waldbeser and Isaac Funk present this possession from which contentment is a byproduct. Contentment is: A state of mind. Being satisfied. A learned experience. Contentment is hindered by: Entitlement Contentment comes by way of: Understanding our limitations. Managing our expectations. Abiding in Jesus. Knowing God. Taking our pain to God. Offloading our desires onto God. Contentment brings about: Thanksgiving. A lifestyle whereby we live within our means. A relinquishing of control. A reduced anxiety about tomorrow.

Sometimes caring comes with a cost. An emotional tax. Overtime we can become spent, tired, irritable and overwhelmed. Living in a world with lots of cares, compassion fatigue is real and is having its impact. In this episode of Breaking Bread, Kathy Knochel and Brian Sutter help us understand how to maintain a measure of health while at the same time engaging in a hurting world. The brokenness of our world is brought to our awareness in increasing measure. From pandemics, natural disasters, wars, famines, injustice, oppression, mistreatment, tragedy, political debacle and societal changes, we are in no lack of matters for which we are aware and for which we care. If the brokenness we are confronted with in our world at large was not enough, matters of deep care and concern fill our personal lives. Loss, divorce, addictions, aging parents, disabilities, financial hardship and more make demands and draw on our physical and mental compassion reservoir. In many ways, a reservoir is a good illustration for the cap

The abortion issue is charged and complicated. Yet there is a simple reality every time - there are two lives to love. In this episode of Breaking Bread this love is made evident by two guests who example what loving life looks like in the hard reality of an unplanned pregnancy. Rita Metz is a sonographer at a pre-abortive ministry called Living Alternatives Pregnancy Resource Center and Kevin Knapp is a volunteer staff member with the connected post-abortive ministry called Deeper Still. Together they beautifully elevate Jesus in this crisis.   Living Alternative Pregnancy Resource Center webpage: Pregnancy Resource Center | Living Alternatives Deeper Still ministry webpage: www.godeeperstill.org

: Perfectionism has a strange advantage among those it afflicts. A need for perfect. Wonderfully there is a perfect answer. Christ came to be our perfection. In this episode of Breaking Bread, Ted Witzig Jr. helps us understand socially prescribed perfectionism and the answer Jesus is to the perfection we long for. Show notes We love perfectionists. Who wouldn’t want a perfectionist as their builder, accountant, or surgeon? Perfectionists hold high standards and are successful and acclaimed because they do. This is precisely why perfectionism is tricky…strengths can become weaknesses. Three types of perfectionism: Self-oriented perfectionism Definition: A person with very high, exacting standards for themselves. Unhealthy Measure: Specific performance Unhealthy Mindset: It needs to be perfect, or I’ve failed. There is no “good enough” in their thinking. Unhealthy Result: Harsh self-criticism & low self-compassion leading to discouragement & depression Remedy: They need to rethink success and reward

“Do your best and leave the rest” is a tricky balance for the perfectionist. Yet it sums up a measure of health for those who have high, exacting standards for themselves or others. In this episode of Breaking Bread, Ted Witzig Jr. teaches us about two types of perfectionism. Show notes We love perfectionists. Who wouldn’t want a perfectionist as their builder, accountant, or surgeon? Perfectionists hold high standards and are successful and acclaimed because they do. This is precisely why perfectionism is tricky…strengths can become weaknesses. Three types of perfectionism: Self-oriented perfectionism Definition: A person with very high, exacting standards for themselves. Unhealthy Measure: Specific performance Unhealthy Mindset: It needs to be perfect, or I’ve failed. There is no “good enough” in their thinking. Unhealthy Result: Harsh self-criticism & low self-compassion leading to discouragement & depression Remedy: They need to rethink success and reward the right thing. Was it adequate? Health

Desires can be tricky. Is it okay to have them? Is it okay to voice them? What if I get my way? Does that make me selfish? In this episode of Breaking Bread, Brian Sutter helps us understand how having and voicing desires is not all bad, in fact, it can be healthy. Unhealthy Desire Healthy Desire Desire for things that God has not allowed. Desire for things that God has given to us to enjoy. Selfishness: insisting on satisfying one’s desires in a way that brings about strife and is at the expense of others. Voicing desires while understanding that others have desires that will need to be acknowledged. Damages relationships. Enhances relationships.    

Vulnerability has become a popular ideal. Authenticity, openness, and being “real” are touted as admirable qualities in our culture. Yet, how does Jesus shape this virtue? In this episode of Breaking Bread, Arlan Miller and Isaac Funk cast a vision for healthy vulnerability and draw from the example of Jesus. Vulnerability Identifiers… Jesus teaches us… How to be vulnerable. How to receive the vulnerable. How beauty can be made from the fruit of vulnerability.

Community has become a popular ideal. A reaction, no doubt, to the ill-effect of our increasingly independent lives. Clubs, groups, associations, and fellowships offer much needed connection and identification for people feeling more and more alone. How is the Christian community unique in providing the connection we fundamentally need? In this episode of Breaking Bread, Arlan Miller and Isaac Funk elevate the community of Jesus. Community Identifiers The Christian Community is… God’s ordained way of extending His love to His own people and with the world. The communion of the Holy Spirit living among its participants. A place where people are known and loved.

The words we use matter: alcoholic, depressed, narcissist, bipolar - these are all examples of labels we use to describe people. Labels stick - for good or bad. In this episode of Breaking Bread, Ted Witzig Jr. helps straighten us out with what sometimes turns into adult name-calling. There is a difference between using labels “for” or “against” people. When labels are used responsibly, they should reflect reality with the intent to bring understanding and help to people. Using Labels "for a Person: Labels accurately reflect reality and are used to chart a healthy path forward. Labels are not the primary identification of a person. Rather, for the Christian, Christ’s identity is primary. Change and redemption is possible. Using Labels "against" a Person: While some labels may accurately reflect reality, they are used to punish or isolate. Labels that do not accurately reflect reality. Labels remain as primary identifier of the individual indefinitely. Change and redemption is not possible.

Our young people transition into adulthood gradually and with assistance. In this episode of Breaking Bread, Kathy Knochel explains the role community plays in this process. She highlights the responsibility that is ours and equips us with the tool set needed to get the job done. Connect with the young people in your life. Know them. Listen to them. Care for them. Challenge them. Equip them. Give responsibility to them. When they fail, receive them.

Forgive, overlook and acknowledge - three verbs that give the embittered a path to freedom. None are easy. In in this episode of Breaking Bread, Craig Stickling brings them near and demonstrates the path out from his own life experience.   Show notes  Bitterness has a root: The root starts with hurt. Hurt that is not properly cared for. This hurt leads to anger. Anger left to seethe and build over time leads to stubbornness. Impenetrable walls are then built to protect. Behind these walls a rebellion settles in. Bitterness grows: Minor and major hurtful events stacked one on top of the other over time breeds a canker. The canker travels  its way into many areas of our lives. Bitterness has a fruit: The fruit tastes of isolation, division and hardness. Bitterness has a remedy: The embittered must engage with the hurt in three ways. Applying forgiveness where they have been sinned against. Overlooking misunderstandings and imperfections where they exist in their offender and acknowledging whatever truth that ma

Hurt, not properly cared for, can turn to bitterness. Bitterness, not properly cared for, defiles much. In this episode series, Craig Stickling addresses properly caring for hurt and bitterness.