Adulting With Ebonie

Are you going through life being more than a little co-dependent? Being a people pleaser? A martyr? Always putting others first?Join the club. I’ve spent most of my life making those same choices.Sometimes these choices come from need. Sometimes they’re incredibly useful and resourceful strategies, at moments when your safety depends on them. But that doesn’t mean you need to stick with those same self-limiting decisions forever.As I’ve matured and my circumstances have changed - as I’ve built a life and a business that feels as good on the inside as it looks on the outside - I have really focused on my values. Value filtered living is where it’s at!In this week’s episode, I’m looking at why choosing yourself is the key to becoming a truly kickass and kind human.Listen on for:The disservice you’re currently doing to yourself (and your audience) and what you can do about it.The impact that choosing myself has had on my business and what I offer the world.My wild intentions for this year… and how you can help m

In this episode of Adulting with Ebonie (the last of season 1), I’m chatting with Jo Casey about Feminine Conditioning.Jo helps coaches and healers to get more clients without sacrificing soul or sanity. She’s a certified coach, speaker, trainer and host of the meaningful business podcast. In addition to being British, Jo is slightly nerdy and determined to help women overcome their female conditioning so that we can step out, be seen and thrive.You can find Jo online and on social media at:https://www.jocasey.com/ https://www.facebook.com/JoCaseyB/https://www.instagram.com/jocaseyb/ Fav quotes from this episode:“Adulting is owning my own shit, emotionally’“We’re given a skewed and limited view of what ‘good’ femininity is”“As a woman you are made of magic. What are you going to do with it?”“Sometimes we tie up the money that we charge with our own personal value”“Magic is priceless… or at least worth the cost of a two week holiday!”“Feminine Conditioning is just propaganda!”“The human race needs a huge

In this solo episode of ‘Adulting With Ebonie’, I’m talking about Endings and Beginnings as season one of ‘Adulting with Ebonie’ draws to a close...Fav quotes from this episode:“I’ve been doing a lot of internal reflection about what the end of this decade means to me.”“Are you willing to say ‘No’ in order to create space?”“There are always going to be endings and beginnings in our lives.”“There have been so many interesting conversations that we’ve had since December 2017 and I want to continue to have incredible conversations with incredible people”In this episode I talk about:The importance of reviewing the last decade, and establishing what exactly the protagonist of your story (you) gets to do in the next chapter. A review of the last 109 episodes and the topics we have covered from the first ever guest episode of Adulting with Ebonie back in December 2017 with Thais Sky on the topic of Bypassing and Privilege.The episodes of ‘Adulting With Ebonie’ that touched on the topic of personal boundaries an

In this week's episode, Ebonie chats with Laurence Shorter about 'getting to things late in life'.Laurence is a creative entrepreneur, speaker, coach and recently - a talk show host! His books include “The Optimist - one man’s search for the brighter side of life”, “A global tour of the world’s most positive people”, and “The lazy guru’s guide to life”, a cartoon book that advocates doing nothing as a new approach to mindfulness.He lives in East Sussex with his wife and two children and helps stressed-out business owners to relax when he’s not at home writing.Find out more about Laurence on his website: http://www.lazyguru.co.uk/ or on Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/thelazyguru/ Fav quotes from this episode:“I can draw a line before and after I had children in terms of adulting”“I wasn’t just slow off the mark with my career, I was slow off the mark with everything!”“You never stop becoming an adult”‘When I talk about myself and my own woes, it’s funny!’“It’s easier to talk about sex than God!”“Somet

This week, Ebonie chats with Harri Rose about 'breaking out of diet culture'.Harri is a certified health coach and author specialising in unapologetic body acceptance. Through her one-to-one coaching, workshops, and writing, Harri teaches her clients how to love their bodies, find more self-compassion and discover what wellness means to them. Her new book ‘You are enough’ is out now. She is also co-creator at the Anti-Diet Riot Club and an emotional resilience trainer with Tough Cookie.You can find Harri's website online at https://www.harrirose.com/Fav quotes from this episode:“I thought by now I would have all my shit together!’“It’s a bit hard, isn’t it, this adulting stuff”“A lot of the trauma that happens around food happens at home”“We need to give ourselves permission to enjoy this festive tradition of feasting… it’s normal, it’s Christmas!”“Food doesn’t have to be hard”“There’s no perfect diet”“You need a rebel attitude to bust out of diet culture and the unrealistic expectations of what we should be

Meet Viktor Lysell SmålänningViktor is a ritual maker who works with rituals as a powerful part of transformative processes, community building and culture change. He approaches the topic of ritual through a lot of directions; by creating art about it, studying it academically, engaging with it spiritually and by taking on the meaningful moments in life with self-made rituals. Since 2013, Viktor has lived in five countries and worked with clients all over the globe on his journey to make sense of how to engage with rituals in the modern world.Viktor has just opened an Instagram account so you’ll be able to find him over on @howtomakerituals in the near future!Fav quotes from this episode:“Without belonging we’re fucked.”“Ritual is a human process that can really facilitate a shift.”“How do I feel today? What is my intention?” “Ritual holds a huge potential for shifting ourselves in relation to what’s going on, and really finding some honesty and some truth about ourselves and the situation that we find o

Meet Lisa Fabrega...As a truth-telling coach, writer and an innovator in the realm of leadership, Lisa has devoted her life to helping people unleash their inner Gandhi, Mother Teresa or MLK’s (or helping ordinary people achieve extraordinary things) so that they can make a powerful impact in the world. One client described her as her “Courage Curator” while another declared her to be “the secret weapon for the world’s next great thought leaders”.Her poems, essays and musings can be found on bentlily.com, Medium and Inside The Jungle Magazine. She has also been featured in CNN, Sports Illustrated and as a guest blogger on LauraRoeder.com.When she’s not helping people ignite their own revolutions in the world, you can find her travelling the world in search of epic nature views and watching the sunset with her laptop in one hand and a piña colada in the other.You can find out more about her over on her website https://lisafabrega.com/, or on Instagram, Facebook or Twitter all @LisaFabregaFav quotes from this e

Meet Marianne CantwellMarianne is the founder of Free Range Humans, she gave the TEDx Talk "the hidden power of not always fitting in" which has been viewed over a quarter of a million times, and she is also the author of the bestselling book Be A Free Range Human. Featured in The Guardian, Business Week and more, it is all about finding your right direction and making it work for who you are so you don't have to fit yourself into someone else's box in order to get paid... and has just been released in a heavily revised second edition! From the UK and Australia, Marianne spent years travelling the world chasing the sun with her business in her laptop and now lives between London and sunny California.Find out more about her over at https://mariannecantwell.com/Fav quotes from this episode:“True freedom is the freedom to dance with the changes that will come your way.”“Life on your terms can look any way that you want it to.”“Community is so vital if you want to succeed.” “Who would you be without your bus

Meet Callum HardinghamCallum is a global adventure and leadership experience facilitator, an inner leadership coach and a life pirate.You can find out more about him over on Instagram @callumhardinghamFav quotes from this episode:“Age is kind of irrelevant, experience is where it’s at.”  “As long as you’re aligned to an intention that is actually bringing more wholeness into your life or is empowering you in some way…the way in which you do that is irrelevant.”“We get so addicted to making what’s outside of us more important than what’s inside of us.”“As we build our connection to courage…then we can face our fears much quicker.”“Stop what you’re doing. Breathe. Listen. Acknowledge. Explore.”In this episode we talk about:How you only really grow up when you take the reins of your lifeAvoiding burnout by learning to recognise and meet your own needs (in the same way that a parent would)The difference between switching off by numbing out and switching off with nourishing downtimeThe importance of conscious

Meet Alice Pulford...Alice is the co-founder of two charities (Tilinanu Orphanage and Love Support Unite Foundation) and the innovative fundraising company: Love Specs. Their ethos is about long-lasting sustainable change and they are all about a leg up and not a handout. Fav quotes from this episode:“The smallest thing can make the biggest impact to change somebody’s life.”“You can do amazing stuff in the world and still be thinking - what am I going to do with my life!?” “If you want to sponsor a child at Tilinanu, you can guarantee that all of the money is going to that and that there isn’t any overheads or administration costs.”“Find a charity that you really love and whose ethos is very similar and go and either become an ambassador for them or go and intern for them.”In this episode we talk about:What inspired Alice to start her first charity aged just 17, and the highs and lows of being a ‘young’ voice in the charitable sectorHow making a big difference to someone’s life can be an easy thing

Meet CS Joseph...CS Joseph is the next up-and-coming expert on Jungian analytical psychology, with a fresh look known as ‘ego hacking’. Chase has been studying psychology for eleven years and is pleased to share some of his cutting edge knowledge on the subject with us in this episode.You can find out more about him over at www.csjoseph.lifeFav quotes from this episode:“You can’t really love other human beings unless you understand them…and you can’t understand anyone else without understanding yourself first.”“How we think we are conducting ourselves within, is NOT how we conduct ourselves without.”“It’s harder to combat an invisible thing than it is to combat something that you can see.”“There is no such thing as ‘I have arrived’, it’s more ‘I need to keep arriving’.”“When people get their personality type verified they either can’t believe it... or have a huge sigh of relief.”“You only gain happiness and satisfaction through continuous growth and improvement.” In this episode we talk about:The repercu

Meet Asa Baav...Asa is a matchmaker and dating coach for the wild at heart. Creating deeper connections through matching people on sexual preferences and overall compatibility. On a mission to remove shame from sexual desires and bring dating back to real life, where real connections happen.You can find out more about her over on her website www.tailormatched.com or on Instagram or Facebook @tailormatchedFav quotes from this episode: “Who am I outside of my career. What do I need? What do I want?”“Make sure you know who you are falling in love with and why.” “If we are bringing this amount of openness and transparency into the bedroom, then that’s going to impact the rest of the relationship in a wonderful way.” “I want everyone to get to the point where it’s ok to talk about everything in a relationship, especially the intimacy side.”“The more I communicate and the more open I am…the more like-minded people I meet." In this episode we talk about:What’s missing from current dating appsThe

The One About The Reality of MORE...In this special 100th episode of ‘Adulting With Ebonie’, I’m chatting with Jo Westwood (Coach and creator of ‘Lovingly Fierce’ - a programme to help break the cycle of codependency) and five members of this year’s MORE group (Lizzy Fone of Tax Angel Accounting, Money Mentor Gail Bainbridge, Community Organiser and Social Activist Emily King, Quiet Confidence founder Tessa Brooks, and Gerlinde Halmer of https://www.sparklewithlindy.com/) about the reality of MORE.In this episode we talk about:What #adulting looked (and felt) like before, and after, MORE for my 2019 mastermind membersHow as children, we assume that trusted adults have all the answers, but that it is okay that they don’t. Plus, we talk about how this awareness can be incorporated into positive parenting.The importance of trust when it comes to adulting.How MORE has had an impact on the business lives of mastermind members this year.Why not everyone has a vision for the future, and that that is okay!The importa

Meet Marie-Claire AshcroftMarie-Claire is a Professional Rebel - a photographer, self-discovery facilitator and fairy dust sprinkler. Just don’t call her Marie; it makes her want to harm innocent children and puppies. She gets to help people embrace their awesomeness for a living and is having lots of fun in the process. Know Yourself. Be Yourself. And f*%@ing own it!Find out more about her over at www.professionalrebel.co.uk Fav quotes from this episode:“A misfit is too innovative, too creative and too full of heart to just clock in and clock out of life.”“I swear and talk about mental health in a relaxed fashion that isn’t too airy-fairy.”“A professional rebel is about…rebelling against what you’re told to do and finding yourself at the core.”“It’s a massively rebellious thing to love yourself.”  “If you don’t start with self-awareness, you can’t go further in any direction.”In this episode we talk about:Two different definitions of rebellion (and what they mean for our personal behaviou

Meet Megan McCannMegan McCann is a business strategy coach, co-founder of the Soul Success Summit. She’s a meditation and mindset teacher and a serial entrepreneur.Find out more about her over on her website www.meganmccannyoga.comFav quotes from this episode:“What do you stand for?”“We put so much pressure on ourselves to achieve a certain outcome and for things to look a certain way that we forget to have fun.”“When I put pressure on myself to fit in a certain box – I am so disconnected from who I truly am.”“How many times can I fail consecutively in order to find out who I really am?”“I thought that once I became successful I would have all of my problems magically figured out with rainbows and fairies and unicorns everywhere…and fortunately, it doesn’t work that way.”In this episode we talk about:Going from being afraid of what people will think, to just following your own pathThe difference between a ‘have to’ to and a ‘get to’ lifeThe importance of finding what lights you up and going after itHow not ev

Meet Amy E. Smith...Amy E. Smith is a certified confidence coach, masterful speaker, and personal empowerment expert. Founder of TheJoyJunkie.com, Amy uses her roles as coach, writer, podcaster, and speaker to move individuals to a place of radical personal empowerment and self-love.With an acute focus on helping people “find their voice”, she is highly sought after for her uncommon style of irreverence, wisdom, and humour and has been a featured expert on Fox 5 San Diego and YourTango.comYou can find out more about her over on her website www.thejoyjunie.com, her free facebook community, or on Instagram @thejoyjunkie.Fav quotes from this episode:“The more we stand in blame and judgement of others, the less empowered we are.”“It’s not that you’re not justified in feeling the anger, it’s just that if you hold onto the anger, you’re the one suffering.”“What if I took the amount of energy that I put into anger and blame and put it into forgiveness or self-love or proactive creation?” “I am not willing to ch

Meet Lucy BrandLucy is a Spiritual Healer, Business Coach & Speaker supporting ambitious women in business to fall in love with themselves, increase their self-worth and as a result, their net-worth.Find out more about Lucy on her website - http://www.lucy-brand.com - or on Instagram. Fav quotes from this episode:“#Adulting means surrendering to love and allowing that to flow into your life”“You have to forgive yourself for past mistakes”“Receiving and accepting love was a game-changer for me”“Love is a feeling of connection”“When you are an adult, you don’t need to seek anyone’s approval”“Language doesn’t always do justice to love” In this episode we talk about:How to increase your capacity to receive loveThe importance of being curious when it comes to extending your capacity to love and receive loveThe problems associated with advice like “You can’t find love until you love yourself”.How you don’t necessarily have to be in a place where you are happy with yourself in order to find love,

Meet Lucy Sheridan.Lucy is the world’s first and only Comparison Coach. Recognised as one of the UK’s most successful coaches by the Times, she is on a mission to cure comparison! Find out more about Lucy here: http://www.proofcoaching.com/ or on Instagram via her handle @lucysheridan. Fav quotes from this episode:“The people I respect and admire the most let other people be themselves”“#Adulting means having shit loads of compassion!”“I have an underlying, unpredictable, very competitive streak.“I’m sick of one-sided relationships and actively seeking genuine relationships”“I’ll take a hangover over 5AM bike rides any day of the week!”“If something is important to you, make a temple in your heart and guard it”In this episode we talk about:How comparison is nothing new, and compassion can be a cure!The importance of not feeling the need to trust everyone, and only sharing your thoughts, hopes and dreams with people who you trust and respect to preserve your energy.How when Lucy stopped fighting [com

Meet Audrey HolstAudrey helps people recover from burnout by helping them connect their bodies and minds. Combining over a decade of experience teaching yoga and mindfulness with extensive training and work as a Certified Professional Coach, she teaches her clients how to tap into their natural resilience and agility so they can handle whatever comes their way.Find out more about Audrey on her website - https://fortitudeandflow.com/ or on Instagram -https://www.instagram.com/fortitudeandflow/Fav quotes from this episode:“People send me pictures of themselves relaxing!”“The ‘hustle’ culture is so toxic and awful.”“#Adulting is how one perceives or handles discomfort”“It’s time to stop competing in Burn out ‘Top Trumps!’”“I wish there was an operating manual for being human”“We need to get comfortable with being uncomfortable.”“Let’s brag about self care!”In this episode we talk about:How bodily comfort and discomfort is interpreted by the nervous system.Why so many of us feel the need to criticise team me

Meet Jo Westwood. Jo is a life coach and author, known for her fun, real, no BS approach to helping you improve your life. She specialises in helping women escape from codependency, reclaim their lives with confidence and live Lovingly Fierce.Her online codependence recovery course is available now at jowestwood.com <http://jowestwood.com>Fav quotes from this episode:“Adulting means knowing who I am, and that’s not a static thing”“The only time you are done as a human being is when you are dead”“Human nature is so fascinating - we’re so weird!”“Figuring out that I was co-dependent and going on my recovery journey was simultaneously one of the most painful experiences but categorically the best experience of my life because it brought me to who I really am - where I could peel away the mask”“We’re seeing so much of the narcissistic/abusive vs. codependent/empathic dynamic being played out on the world stage in such a huge way at the moment”“I’ve never heard the word ‘gaslighting’ so much since 2016”“I ca